Ed's so called life

New Scheme; Opinions Divided

2010-11-26T17:02:00.001Z

Watching Loose Women only today – I know there is a trend at the moment towards not watching Loose Women and saying it’s rubbish, but honestly, it isn’t half bad you know! – I was reminded of how often the following things happen: a seemingly simple subject, one that you’d think would not divide opinion, divides opinion massively. The subject this time? It was about the government’s most recent scheme to get unemployed people back to work, and it goes like this: force people who have been long-term unemployed to work for four weeks a year, otherwise take away their benefits.

Personally, I think this is a sound idea. It means that long-term unemployed people get a chance to work with no real pressure, thus easing them into the work-place lifestyle again, and it means that all the jobs that nobody wants to do get done. But of course, there was an other opinion being bandied about, and this one said that it was unfair, because they weren’t getting paid for all this hard work.

Now, while it’s a fair point, if you ask me, what else would they be doing other than working? It’s a well known fact that most people who don’t work – who haven’t worked for a long time, I should say – sit around doing nothing, so isn’t it a fine thing that they get productive? I understand the point about them not being paid, but surely after doing these four weeks of work they might get the incentive they need to REALLY search out a job they like, no?

Either way, something needs to be done about the problem of long-term unemployment. And whether it’s giving people jobs at Bristol Airport Parking , re-painting the white lines, or working as volunteers in shops, I can only see this scheme as proving to be a positive thing.

Sugar In Your Tea?

2010-11-26T15:29:00.001Z

I am one of those odd people you meet in the pub on a Friday night; you might get into a conversation with me about Cellulite treatment, or you might get into a conversation with me about the current state of ten pin bowling and how it’s a shame when you go to one of these places and they don’t have any disco lights to make your game a bit more interesting and fun. In other words, I have the (annoying to some) habit of jumping from one topic to another without any warning whatsoever: today’s topic is sugar in my tea.

See, today marks a good or bad – I am as of yet undecided about which – occasion: the first time I have had sugar in my tea since 2007 (three years ago). And you know what? I shall tell you: it feels really great! The reason I stopped having sugar in my tea is simple: I wanted to stop consuming so much sugar (he’s a genius!). Only the thing was, after a while I started to miss it, and the only reason I continued not having sugar was because I had made a promise to myself.

But in the end, I broke. I had been watching This Morning and the subject in discussion was when to enjoy yourself and sin, and when to not sin because the sin outweighed the amount of enjoyment. So in a way I was testing the theory out: seeing if putting sugar back into my brew made a difference or not, and I can safely say it did. I am now certain – after two cups of tea – that I have made the right decision in the end and that it probably won’t do me any harm (hmm, maybe it might be better to stop eating so much chocolate instead of blaming the sugar in my tea?).

Learning Your Lessons

2010-10-30T12:55:00.001Z

Wandering aimlessly around the supermarket last week – is there any other kind of supermarket wandering, men? – incontinence pants were the very last thing on my mind. Actually, they weren’t even in my mind. Ahead of them, if this was a list, would have been Thinking about how attractive Margaret Thatcher might have been many years ago when she hadn’t developer her war face, and What kind of ratio of concrete to water do they use to make curbs which flank English roads? See what I mean? It wasn’t even registering. Not until I stepped forward and knocked an old man with a zima frame.

“Oy, chocolate moron!” he yelled, and it was aggressive and I did not expect that from this frail old man.

“What? I’m sorry, ok, it was an accident,” I replied. You’ll notice that I didn’t answer back on the “chocolate moron” insult. The answer to this is simple: I was carrying a load of chocolate in my arms – those big bars of Galaxy which you never actually see people buy but they must, because otherwise why would Galaxy continue to go to the trouble of making them? – and this must have added considerable weight to my knocking into him, so he had every right to be angry.

“I used to be like you, chocolate idiot,” said the man, shaking his head, attempting to pick up what would transpire to be pants to hold back the flow of you know what.

“Very good,” I said, “now look I’ve said sorry, so do you think we could drop the chocolate based insults now please?”

He nodded and introduced himself, and then he started telling me about the days before he wet himself in public and I felt it was only morally right to listen to him. And listen I did, until I was myself panicking about when my public-wetting-myself time would come.

Eventually I got away from him, but there was also something else there then: a reminder that I was getting older and that we weren’t that dissimilar (apart from age and urinal status). And also a reminder that if you carry that much chocolate around then you do invite insults...

Dangerous Times

2010-10-30T12:51:00.000Z

Growing up, I used to think that skydiving was the most dangerous thing you could do with your clothes on, closely followed by bungie jumping. However, on a more day-to-day level these two couldn’t compare to getting our budgie out of the cage without getting viciously attacked. No, that was a serious feat that required nerves of steel and pretty serious gloves, you see. The reason for this was that our Budgie could bite – yes, I said BITE – through anything. And I do mean anything. Which is why she died early if you ask me: with such a vicious attitude to captivity, it wasn’t surprising that we found her on her back with her legs in the air after only three years of living.

Talking of dangerous things, it’s amazing how progressive us humans are at inventing new and even more dangerous ways to experience getting a rush. One such thing which I am told ranks right at the cutting-edge of almost killing yourself is proximity flying (or wingsuit proximity flying as its known by mentalists everywhere). This involves donning a kind of bat suit and jumping off a cliff. Best results – and thrills – are achieved when you do it off a cliff where there are lots of bits sticking out which you have to dodge at speed...

Watching this on TV the other day, it was hard to believe it was actually real. Allowing the enthusiasts to travel not only down but forwards simultaneously, they were hurtling towards the rockface, and several times were less than three feet from it...

The best part of the documentary for me was the way it made these mentalists – sorry, hardcore enthusiasts – to be so normal; some were doing primary teaching jobs or working as electricians, and then on the weekend they’d fly to Switzerland to hurl themselves off cliffs.

Well, I am fine, thank you. I highly doubt I’ll be entering into this any time soon. That said, it was fun to watch, and they say it isn’t that hard, once you’ve done about 800 sky dives and are experienced...

The Tragic State Of Football And Our Planet

2010-09-29T17:16:00.000Z

If you have a few moments spare and are still reeling with shock and disappointment about the World Cup (I know it’s been a while but there is a man on my street who can’t even look at cups and who looks like he might have a heart attack if you shout the word WORLD at him loud enough) then you might find solace in the following story. Just click on the link:
http://www.eniginstories.com/2010/06/28/it-is-just-too-awful/
Now, while I myself wasn’t too concerned with the disappointment that was our football team – I was always rubbish at sports at school, what do you expect? – I have seen the effect of being concerned all around me: at work, people who are still upset about this have become very lazy. What I mean is that because they constantly have this on their mind, they can’t be bothered to do the simplest things to help the place run more efficiently. In other words, recycling goes out the window, leaving lights on becomes a regular thing and wasting energy in general becomes the norm.
It’s the same when anything tragic happens; everyone forgets about that gaping hole in the Ozone layer – yes, sadly it is still there, despite what the politicians might tell you – and just gets on with their life, as though the world can mend and heal itself without any help from us. But here’s the thing: the world has had enough of trying to fix and heal itself.
And wouldn’t you have? You try finding a plaster big enough to cover such an enormous wound... Thankfully, there are people like me and you (if you also don’t love football more than life itself) around to remind them football lovers that recycling and energy saving is important! There is a very positive side to all this, of course; when we do start doing REALLY well at football again, that pride and enthusiasm is bound to translate to energy saving and the like. Now, when that happens it will be a fantastic day, and it will happen, I am sure. This is England after all people! We’ll get there in the end.

Liberal Dem Must Embrace Power And Ignore The Criticisms

2010-08-30T10:12:00.000Z

Politics has always been a major leading pillar, whether we like it or not. I must admit that I agree to some extent with the pro-European Union vision of the Lib Dems and implicitly of Mr. Clegg. . However, the union is still fractured unfortunately, at least until all countries will find a common denominator, and of course, until our country will accept that this is the best solution for entire Europe. I do not understand why some people go entirely on contrary beliefs with the ones supported by the Liberal Democrats. I think that they support values that are very precious for today’s economy and for peace maintenance.

Some individuals seem bothered by the fact that the party sustains ideas like environmentalism, which is among the most important issues today when energy has become such a scarce resource. Everyone wants to enjoy their ski holiday and not concern themselves with such matters.

Then, they also have a problem with the fact that the party wants the British troops out of Iraq once and for all. Promoting peace, I believe is the most important, and just as Clegg says, instead of fabricating Trident missiles the money should be spent on housing, infrastructure, etc. The defense of individual rights is yet another positive issue they promote, which, again I do not understand why some people continue to blame. Should we be involved in continuous wars of hatred and conquer instead of developing and flourishing even more?

Nevertheless, until the great majority avoids understanding the real importance of all these issues, it will take a long time until the situation is stable and clear in the realm. Everybody notices only the dark side of them in general, but think of that there were also good things that were achieved, such as a raise in tax threshold for those who struggle with a minimum income. Even though around 70% of the British do not agree with their politics, I think at least they should be given the chance to prove they are right regarding certain common issues that preoccupy us today.

Key reasons why US healthcare reform was so important

2010-07-30T11:20:00.002Z

The Commonwealth fund recently took part in an international survey which compared the United States'healthcare system with those of the United Kingdom, Canada, Germany, New Zealand, Holland and Australia. All of these countries provide universal health care coverage (as do numerous others such as France and Sweden) and most pay a significantly lower proportion of their GDP on their medical care than the United States. Currently, 17.5% of US GDP funds health care and yet the country ranks below all of these other listed countries on the accessibility for care. This is something that social conservatives fail to grasp – that a country with supposedly the best healthcare available on the planet and the highest level of government spending is incapable of providing that care to all of its citizens. Many Obamacare opponents use skewed data to support claims that the Democrats’ new healthcare plan will ration standards of care and lead to longer waiting lists. They describe how patients in countries such as Britain and Canada have to wait several weeks or months for treatment but they use data based on minute samples. They refuse to admit that the waiting list for some 50 million Americans is, wait for it: forever due to lack of long term care insurance.

If you are an American without health care insurance, who is terminally ill and cannot afford to pay tens of thousands of dollars worth of medical treatment then you might as well live in a third world country. If you have a pre-existing condition that your medical insurance company is unaware of, you may be rejected for claiming insurance on your medical treatment – regardless of how life-threatening your health condition may be. This is the fundamental crisis that has plagued the American health care system for so many decades. Assuming Republicans don’t repeal the Democrats’ Obamacare plan in the future, one day Americans will realise that Obama’s health care plan was one of the greatest political achievements of 21^st century America. Especially in the face of such overwhelming opposition from the right.

How I equity released myself to be mortgage free

2010-07-30T11:20:00.001Z

Buying a home at the beginning of the house price boom in the late 90’s was always going to be a good idea. No prizes for that. However what I decided to buy, in my late twenties was barely a home, needing as it did so much renovation that friends thought it should have been condemned. I knew however it had great potential if I could just bring it back to it’s former glory.

The trouble I had though was what most young people suffer from - lack of money. I needed a way round that and equity release was the solution for me although in reversal of the usual method of equity release.

At first I financed the intial works of new roof, windows and doors, central heating, plastering and kitchen with loans, credit cards and HP payments. Getting myself deeper into debt was slightly troubling however I was sure it would eventually be a success due to the rising market increasing the value of the property naturally and the bank’s willingness to release the equity I was creating. Equity release was always going to be my safety net, my soft landing.

The money I was ploughing into the property was returning at a much higher rate in terms of value and after a year, and with my 0% credit deals coming close to their offer end date, I was able to release enough equity now in th home to pay off the debts accrued during the renovation stage. In addition the house was now worth so much more due to the rising market increasing my personal equity.

The next step was to pick the right time to sell and after living in the home for 7 years of living there I sold up and moved into rental accomodation hoping that, in line with what should happen, the bubble would eventually burst.

As I was still working my rent was covered and my savings were secure and when the market did eventually collapse I was able to pick up a place for cash and be finally, in my mid thirties, mortgage free. Yes it needs work but I am pretty sure it will be worth it although this time I won’t need to release any equity to pay for it.

How I equity released myself to be mortgage free

2010-07-30T10:00:00.000Z

Why You Should Bother?

2010-06-08T16:06:00.001Z

I was always one of those people who thought blogging was for nerds, the same way going to a financial advisor was a waste of time if you run a small business (believe me: it’s not...). But now look at me! I’m worse than anyone I know! I love a good blog, and, using all that I have learned from blogging, here are a few reasons why you should start your own blog up and love it too.

1) It’s a good place to vent your ideas: writing a blog is like having a go at your mental punch bag. It allows you to get rid of all your ideas – irrelevant of if they work or not, who cares? It’s your blog? – and moan about whatever you choose. That’s a good enough reason on its own if you ask me.

2) You can be part of something amazing: there are millions of blogs out there. Isn’t it cool to think that you are part of what is basically a new and amazing revolution?

3) It’s free! That’s right folks. It’s completely free. There are loads of blog providers who offer free blogs. You don’t have the unlimited choice you would get from having your own web-site, it’s true, but you do have a fair bit of freedom to customize it how you see fit.

4) If you’re a writer why not show your work? If you’re a band then you can publicize yourselves and upload music for your fans to hear. For all these reasons and many more you should get a blog.

Evolutionism vs. Creationism? Why not Both?

2010-05-26T08:21:00.000Z

Instead of concerning yourself about petty things like cosmetic eyelid surgery maybe we should be giving thought to something such as evolution versus creationism. The oldest debate known to man rages on even to this day, with those in favour of evolution believing that it is ridiculous to believe in such childish things like God and Heaven. On the other side, the Creationists hold true to their age old beliefs and will not allow anyone to convince them otherwise. But does it have to be that way? Why can’t it be both?

Evolutionists point to the obvious mistakes of the Bible. How can you believe God created the world in seven days? They ask. Well it’s a good point, but it’s flawed. They are not looking at it in the right way. Here’s an example: you are God, and you want to explain to the people of the world how the universe and everything within it were created. Remember, the people of 4,000 years ago were not the most sophisticated people in the world. They believed that the world was flat and only consisted of a small area of land, they thought the sky was finite and the stars were holes in Heaven. They thought the smallest micronism in the world was a flea (only what they could see). How do you, as God with unlimited knowledge, explain the Big Bang, or even microbacteria and particles, neutrons and quarks? You explain it to them as you would a child: “n the beginning, I created the Heavens and the Earth”; i.e. the Big Bang. How else could God explain such advanced ideas to these primitive people?

If God truly exists then He would logically use science to do his bidding. Why wouldn’t he? If God is real, then He also created science, or at least functions within its boundaries.

It is easy to make criticisms and to choose a side. Sure, I believe in God, but I’m not an idiot. Evolution is the logical way of things, and just because the Bible got it wrong (or should I say how people have interpreted the Bible) doesn’t mean God isn’t real.

It's Just Never Good Enough, Is It?

2010-05-10T10:44:00.000Z

People love a good moan about the Internet, don’t they? Here we have a highly impressive technological advance, one that enables us to communicate with one another instantly and send vast amounts of data to one another in seconds, and yet we still moan our heads off!

If you are of the older generation, cast your mind back to a time when there was no capital I in Internet. If you are younger, the generation where laser hair removal treatment is something you do on the top of the bus with some new-fangled machine, well, I doubt you’ll even believe what I’m about to say–

I remember the Internet when it was just a baby. The “ee-orrrrr” noises my computer made as it loaded up a web-page (a half-hour thing); the wonder of an image manifesting on the screen–an image of a far away place which only a hand-full of people had seen in real life!

And I was seeing it!

Back then you couldn’t do electronic transfers and see naughty pictures, though. If you wanted to look at naughty pictures and you lived with your family then you needed to make sure that everyone was out of the house for at least ten hours and all the doors and windows were securely locked.

Those were the days, and I wish people would still remember them! So what if it takes longer than three seconds to get what you want, is that really reason to curse and rant at the screen? I don’t think so.

A Cycle To Be Broken.

2010-04-28T12:04:00.001Z

With the impending general election, we are hearing and seeing a lot of politicians. They have invaded the television channels, the radio waves and every newspaper we read. It can all become pretty boring after a while, but (unfortunately) this is how new governments are formed. Those of us that have no real interest in listening to MPs putting one another down will just have to grin and bear it.

One of the burning issues on the agenda of every political party is the criminal justice system. What can be done to reduce the crime on our streets? And what is the best way of punishing offenders? Throwing criminals into prison is all well and good, but there are far more deep-rooted issues to address. Why do people commit crime in the first place?

Many criminals have a drug habit and they are simply stealing to get their next fix. But why do so many people become involved with drugs in the first place? Is our society so bad that our young people need to find a means of escape? If that is the case, then something is very seriously wrong. Perhaps if we tackled the reasons behind this, then far fewer people would be attracted to the oblivion of illegal substances in the first place. A friend of mine over at triple west medical thinks that they may be rooted in an even deeper problem with the NHS. But you try telling any British person that their health system isn’t all it is cracked up to be and see what they say.

When a user is arrested for robbery, burglary or a similar offence they are normally sent to a run-of-the-mill prison. This is great as far as punishment goes, but how is it going to challenge the way they think? This IS a medical problem. The chances are they have been involved with the drug lifestyle for a good many years and they are used to living that way; after all, it isn’t all woe and misery. There are always the odd times when they will get lucky and have enough money to buy plenty of smack for a week.

Looking at it like this, you can see how they will end up in exactly the same cycle after they have served their time. And this is absolutely pointless. It is a waste of time and money for society and a fruitless task for the individual. We need to have far more rehabilitation clinics where addicts can successfully turn their lives around.

All About Marketing

2010-04-11T15:21:00.001Z

Everyone has heard the word marketing but how many of us can actually explain what it really involves? Alright, we might be able to say what marketing people do, but what about the deeper stuff? The stuff that you don’t dare ask because it sounds like you’re being stupid?

Of course, it’s nobody’s fault. To all but the most savvy, marketing (and internet marketing, of course, which is entirely its own entity) is a strange and alien thing which just seems to happen. But as anyone with their own business knows, marketing is absolutely everything and never just happens: everything is planned perfectly. The wrong marketing campaign will break a business. The right one will streamline it, making it super-efficient. The end result will mean increased profit and a growing reputation that only looks set to become more noteworthy.

Everyone in business has their own take on how marketing is done correctly. With so many opinions, how can you reasonably sort out the ones that make sense from the ones that don’t?

Enigin are candid about their own understanding of marketing. How candid? Just click the link and see for yourself.

I have to say, I’ve read up on marketing theory at a few web-sites, and it isn’t often that you get this much real information. Usually it’s just a lot of talk and projections about what will be done, but this post is different: it discusses marketing tactics, why they do and don’t work, and, most importantly, backs it all up with good reasoning that anyone can grasp. Here’s my suggestion: if you know absolutely nothing about marketing then check out these guys. You could do far worse.

Lama Story

2010-03-30T14:08:00.001Z

The Lama: kind of like a weird looking horse in need of neck lift surgery – Camel type thing. I find this animal fascinating. Anything that looks like that and can pull of a decent hair-do deserves respect in my book.

But not everybody thinks so, of course, no. Some people have it in for Lamas in a big way. “They spit, the devils!” people scream. “They’re vicious!” they exclaim. Well I ask you, have you ever seen a vicious Lama? And wouldn’t you spit from time to time if everyone pointed at you and laughed? I think you would.

So I took it upon myself to test the theory out. I went to a Lama sanctuary to confront these awful un-true stereotypes. To clear the Lama’s good name once and for all!

It was a bright July day. I was standing about 500 metres from the Lamas, a kind-looking bunch, who weren’t saying or doing a lot, but I didn’t doubt had to be extremely hot under that dense coat of hair.

I approached with caution, watching their faces. This was pointless, of course, seeing as Lamas, like most creatures, are about at good at facial expressions as Dale Winton is at looking macho.

At the gate I beckoned the biggest one over, the one I’d already started calling ‘Big Red’. I could have beckoned the smallest one, but I thought If I am going to do this properly then I need to go the whole hog!

He came to me, smiling, and I patted him on the head. He seemed to like it, and I didn’t doubt for a second that if he’d have been able to lift his hoof as high as my head, he’d have done the same.

That was when he spat in my face.

The moral of this story? Always choose a smaller creature when testing such theories out, and never tell anyone you got spat on, because it really changes peoples perception of you.

The Big B

2010-03-30T14:07:00.001Z

The word Budget doesn’t have too bad an effect on me, really. I think that’s because it reminds me of a supermarket I used to frequent as a child which I shall not name here, but starts with B and ends in udgens. But the words The Budget on the other hand–Ooh–They’re a different story. First it makes me think of a terrible horror film called The Budgie, and secondly it makes me think of the government and all its finance malarkey–

Even worse.

Go to the following blog to see the thoughts of someone else who thinks The Budget is also fairly ambiguous–

It shouldn’t be, of course. It should be as easy as 1.2.3. But it never is, of course, because that would mean we would know too much–

I really don’t know who to blame about The Budget. In some ways I am pleased we have a Budget at all—because the people of some countries are lucky to get bags of rice—and in some ways I just wish we didn’t have the hassle. But it’s important, of course, and actually it isn’t the government’s fault that it’s complicated. And it really is, you know. If you thought A Level maths was a pain in the ass then think about a maths paper so long that even if you studied it 24 hours per day for the rest of your life, you probably wouldn’t get close to finishing the test.

Therefore, if you care about The Budget the best thing to do is to source information. And it’s out there, so get started. You’ll be surprised how much better off you’ll be for knowing the concrete facts.

Say No To A Shetland

2010-03-24T16:59:00.001Z

Disclaimer: No Shetland Ponies were harmed in the making of this article. Well, at least only a bit.

Shetland Ponies are so cute. Their gorgeous, yet strangely woe-is-me little faces and strange wispy hair. Their short legs. Their passive, gentle, child friendly personality. Well that was what I used to think, until I ran in to one. And I do mean quite literally. I was running through a field after being chased by a stag at night (I was trying to get a close-up of his antlers) when I smacked in to this Shetland.

At first I thought I’d hit a really wide human-being who was wearing a fur coat. Then I realized that the kind of hair couldn’t be from a fur-coat; not only that but the thing had a massive head much bigger than anyone bar Morrissey and his chin could have. Then it neighed and I neighed back. The stag had gone, fortunately, and so I said, “Hello there little Shetland Pony, how are you?”

He—and I can assure you that it was a HE—neighed again, and this time he raised his front arm. I took this to mean he wanted to shake hands, so I knelt down and shook his hoof. That was when he flipped out, twisting around and hoofing me in the face. I stepped back, bemused, and wondered what I’d ever done to him.

I may have said, “what have I ever done to you apart from love you and your species, you bloody Shetland!” Or I may not. He had broken my nose and blood was pouring out. I imagined getting home to discover a hoof-shape marked burned in to my face, thanks to the moody so called cute one.

He didn’t give me an answer so I kicked him. Right in the rump of his big furry bum. He didn’t much like this, but fair is fair and what can I say, he should have just gotten horse insurance!

Clever yet Dumb

2010-03-23T12:32:00.000Z

I grew up thinking that clever people ruled the world, so it was a shock when, sometime during my early teens, I realised that the world was actually controlled by a lot of stupid people, and some clever people who did really stupid things. Which got me thinking: does it matter if you are dumb or clever? Surely the most important thing is how you perceive the world and the timing of your actions?

My theory was proved right when I started Sixth Form: the boy at the back of the class who never said anything and appeared to be a mute turned out to be the smartest person I would ever meet. He may have been the world’s biggest advertisement for acne laser treatment, but there was more to him than met the eye...

It was so weird. We all knew the boy as ‘the boy who never spoke or did anything’; the boy who nobody thought would ever achieve anything. But all that changed one day when he came in to college, walked straight up to the teacher and said something to her which was too quiet to hear. Then he walked out and smiled at us at the door. Then he was gone. The teacher stood there dumbfounded and unable to speak. Eventually we found out what he had said, and the look of total bemusement on her face made perfect sense: Geoff had just sold his tiny bedroom internet-marketing company for 4 million dollars.

So it just goes to show: never judge a book by its cover. Even the dull books can turn out to be masterpieces.

Semi

2010-03-22T13:45:00.001Z

There are some words which should never have been invented and the world would be perfectly fine without: Hull is one and Semi is another. Hull should never have been invented for obvious reasons—you could call a part of a boat ‘that bit there’ easily enough and the other usage is something I can’t get in to here for legal reasons and also because I’d quite like to keep my face—and Semi is just a useless, inept, flaccid, impotent word, hence it’s similarity to the aforementioned H word and the place it denotes (but not the people, it’s well known that Hull people are a fine bunch and wouldn’t hurt a fly).

What does Semi even mean, anyway? If you want to describe something as not quite hard you can say ‘that’s not quite hard enough’ or ‘that’s a bit soft’ or even, if you’re bored of those two, ‘that’s awfully pathetic and flaccid looking, isn’t it?’ And if you’d like to say something is not soft you can say ‘that’s really very hard, hard as granite’ or my personal long-term favourite ‘that’s proper raging hard check it out!’. So there really is no good use for Semi. It’s four letters too long and a waste of space by even the dumbest word-smith’s standards.

Of course, if you’re the kind of American who wouldn’t be seen dead at the country-club without his ’her semi-automatic, you’re probably gunning for me now (Ha!). Do I care? No. Because if you’re that bothered, and if the word Semi does miraculously become erased from the consciousness of humanity—we can only hope—then you could use a number of alternatives, couldn’t you? The world isn’t going to fall apart if Semi disappears suddenly, you see. The world will do just fine without an infinite number of Semi’s to bog down the literary imaginations of every man, woman and child.

One last thing, I was talking with my brother the other day and he says that in the economic slowdown lots of businesses are turning towards team building activity london to hearten the employees. I don’t really know how I feel about this, I mean it’s a pleasant thought but it is never going to stimulate people as much as a nice big bonus is it?

The Jon Venables Question

2010-03-19T15:14:00.000Z

The Jon Venables case that grips our nation like no other at the moment raises serious questions – not just for the government and law makers of the land, but for each and very one of us. I have found myself questioning the very notion of what is ‘need to know’ for the public as well as where I stand on the concepts of forgiveness and rehabilitation.

Let me make this clear, I am as appalled as anybody by the disgusting crimes that were committed by Thompson and Venables, and particularly by the allegations that Jon Venables has now reoffended. The full extent of their inhuman crimes against James Bulger have never been revealed, but from all reports they go beyond the comprehension of you and I.

I can fully understand the calls of the parents of James Bulger for the details of Venables’ new crime to be made public. I can also understand, in a way, the media frenzy that has backed this call but on consideration I do find myself backing Justice Secretary, Jack Straw.

The right to a fair trial is a cornerstone of our society, if we take away this right, or bend this right, then how long until we do away with the rule of law altogether and end up with a police state? If the details of Venables’ crime was confirmed and if he had to face the jury under his real name, rather than the new, secret, identity given to him when he was released from his initial sentence then it seems impossible that the jury would even entertain the notion that he might be innocent of the charges against him. I am fully confident that he is guilty, as I do believe that he is evil through and through, but equally I believe that all people facing trial should be presumed innocent until proven guilty.

Of course, all of this could have been avoided if Venables and Thompson had never been released from prison after their first horrific crimes. I am a liberal-minded man in general, and do believe that prison should be a place of rehabilitation as well as punishment. Having given this serious thought however, I do feel that the crimes of Venables and Thompson were so heinous that there can be no rehabilitation for them – for the safety of the public they should have rotted in prison until death. Age was no defence for these two monsters.

So I myself have faced uneasy questions over this black affair, but I have come out of it with a clearer understanding of how I feel about justice today.

I think I have a solution everyone will agree upon for what we should plan for Clive’s pre-wedding weekend. We should sort out some ski chalet holidays as a surprise, who’s in?

Staring

2010-03-18T13:53:00.001Z

That look that a dog has at it stares at a door, willing it to open, and too stupid to not even realize that that is what he or she is doing, and that (even in the case of clever dogs) willing a door to open doesn’t really mean a thing anyway–I’ve been perplexed like that many times, mostly while inebriated (once when I was ten years old and completely sober, after a rugby ball hit me so hard in the head that I didn’t know what day it was). Well, maybe not quite as perplexed as a staring dog, but pretty flabbergasted. And that should hardly come as a great surprise to you the reader. Confusion is all around us and takes many shapes and forms. No sooner have we solved one problem than we’ve brought a dozen greater ones upon ourselves!

I’m sure it’s not just me. I’m certain I can’t be the only person in the world who has sat (or slumped) with a friend drinking cheap cider and debated if it’s possible to build stairs which ascend but also enable you to go downhill simultaneously, or why it is that Lion’s have such tidy mains and no feasible means of going to the hairdressers. These are the great riddles of mankind, and be warned: if you are a young reader you may wish to not know that this will continue throughout your life. Year after year, no matter what great knowledge you compile, new challenges and ridiculous questions will crop up, especially when drunk. But that’s what makes life so great, isn’t it? No drinking, I mean, although it has its merits. Us humans not only have the power to drive our own species in to the ground but we can, unlike other animals, do so while going out to buy designer clothes, making appointments at Laser Hair Removal Manchester, and doing a great number of activities which seem so much more important.

Why we all can succeed

2010-03-17T10:47:00.001Z

Success, contrary to what some may say, is not based on the level of your education or the number of contacts you’ve accumulated. The key to success is your mindset. And because confidence and belief in yourself is required, all of us can be successful.

First determine what you want to succeed in. This could be success in your career, your wallet, education, building a family, or enjoying life. Success is determined by what you want to do and if you can do it or not. All of us can do this, we have the ability to decide what we want to achieve.

My brother for example, has wanted for as long as I can remember to accumulate a vast sum of money. It’s not my idea of success, but it is for him. After only a decade, my brother has succeeded in his goal. He has more money than I can think of and he’s done it by his own hands. He has succeeded because he made his goal and strived to achieve it.

My other brother had different goals. His main goal was to create and maintain a healthy family life. He married at 22 and, now at age 39, has three beautiful daughters, a great house, and a loving wife. He set his dreams and drove to achieve them. And he succeeded in his goal.

Whatever your goal is, you will be successful if you believe that it is possible to achieve. If you set your goals unrealistically, you will surely be unsuccessful. If your goals are not monetary, I commend you, for you are a welcome change from the ideals of success given to us by society. If you reach your personal goals without adhering to what society tell us (buy stuff, get married, work 9 to 5, have 2.2 kids and an SUV in the driveway) then you are a true success story. Success is what you make it, not what others tell you.

Thirdly you will need to take appropriate action. All goals ae useless unless action follows it. each one of us has the potential to create a plan of action by gathering all the information we need about how to achieve our goal.. The trick is how will we execute it.

Paired Up

2010-03-08T17:52:00.001Z

Being single is fantastic. You get to wear odd socks, act / speak / walk like a Neanderthal / Gibbering idiot with no threat of a slap round the head, and you can please yourself in a number of ways which just aren’t possible when you have a partner. For example, if I want to eat the crumbliest, most fall-apart-able cookies in bed—a pet hate my ex girlfriend held against me for the duration of our relationship—I can do so as much as I desire! But there are draw-backs, as everyone knows. One of the draw-backs of being single is that when I go to buy clothing I don’t have that oh so lovely scenario of getting home and being told that what I’ve purchased is utterly crap...

OK, so the point is that it’s easy to be bitter about partnerships, when in fact a partnership is sometimes not half bad. It can, I am even informed by partnered-up people (annoying successful ones) actually be a beautiful thing. Enigin have their own perspective on partnership (this time it’s the business kind).

As I grow older, facing the inevitable situation of being ‘partnered’ again, I find myself not worrying as much. Especially as Enigin have put my mind at rest, talking about all the advantages that being one of a pair of people--or part of a team--has over being a single, a social leper, a lonely, looked-down upon human-being.

Bitter and twisted? Have a read and think about it!

Your Worst Enemy

2010-02-22T10:33:00.000Z

The NBC TV show My Own Worst Enemy, starring Christian Slater as a secret-agent implanted with a computer chip that could—hold on to your seat if you don’t know—change him in to a completely different person at the will of his ‘handlers’, was a short lived affair lasting only nine episodes. Even so, it quickly garnered a cult-fan-base. Or at least more than a few people harbouring a disturbing fascination with the progression of technology. One such question is, however, pretty fascinating. Want to know more?

So what would I do if I had a super computer? What a question that is. Firstly, I’d solve world peace, get that out of the way before I forgot, and then I’d make it mandatory for every person who wanted to become a manager of any kind to be implanted with such a chip, and then I’d let the employees take control of the super computer on Fridays, so that they could find a personality in the manager that they actually liked–Incredible!

But seriously, it’s a good question worth asking. With a super-computer you could do a lot of things: one thing I particularly hate doing, for example, just because it is so time wasting, is making sandwiches: think about it! Everything else can be done at home, almost, except that. It would revolutionize sandwich making and knock George Foreman’s grill off the top spot as number one sandwich making device of all time!

What other great things could you do with a super computer? Well, I suppose if it was so super you could get it to call in sick when you didn’t want to go into work. For the high price that’d be worth it alone.

Top Tips For Drawing In Customers Into Your Business

2010-02-19T15:35:00.000Z

Building a business whether it be on the product side or on the business opportunity side can be a daunting task. It does not have to be that way if you put your imagination to use and get busy. Many people fail in business because they forget the part about taking action. So do it - come up with some marketing ideas and get busy building that business of yours. Some tips below should get you started.

* Brand Yourself - There are many ways to do this and it is extremely important to do so. People buy from people and they sign up with people; not businesses. It is not the business that does the selling, it is the business owner (or representatives in the case of brick and mortar establishments). This is why it is important to brand yourself as a leader in your industry. You need to be out there building relationships with people. Building a business means being selfless. Be in the process of helping others as best you can and you will naturally attract them to you. Also, when you are busy helping others, it positions you as an expert in what you do and people will see that.

* Brand Your Business - This is a bit different than branding yourself.(As you could imagine if your business was something like luxury bathroom accessories) You can brand your business simply by getting it’s name out there. This can be in the form of t-shirts, coffee mugs, pens, key chains and basically anything you can plant your business logo on.

* Give Away Free Stuff - Just about everyone likes things for free. This is a big opportunity for your to get your product out there. Even if you give out a sample of your product for free, it still gets your business name out there for future sales.

* Online marketing - Let’s not forget about online marketing. The Internet is big and has so much opportunity to market yourself and your business. Take advantage of online classifieds, forums, blogs, Ezines, traffic exchanges, PPC, PPV, SEO, article writing and many other marketing techniques available on the Internet to get people to notice your business.

These are some tips to get you started in building your business and gaining customers. Have fun with the endless possibilities that are out there to get your business noticed.

The World Is Such A Small Place

2010-02-11T13:31:00.001Z

I can’t help but think that technology has made the world too small. Not that it has literally gotten smaller of course, but with the ability to communicate with anyone, wherever they may be in an instant with a long distance phone call or with internet applications such as MSN Messenger and Skype, it sure does feel that way.

Don’t get me wrong, technology has improved a lot of the aspects of our lives and for the better. Urgent news can be sent very fast, calls for aid and help are received instantly, with the disaster in Haiti being an example of how fast the world can respond to a crisis. Without modern technology it may have been many months before we knew about what happened there, if we ever did.

Flying to a destination is also something I dislike doing. Not only because I am not the best flyer, but because in only a few hours, you can be across the world. When I step off the plane it does not feel like I have travelled to a new destination because the trip was so short. I don’t feel like I am somewhere new. I prefer trains, cars, and ships, because you are moving across the land itself. When you have travelled for a while to reach a distant land, it feels like you are in a new place and that is the feeling I want.

I sometimes wish that we could go back a few years and stop a few things from happening, but I know that I would end up missing some of the modern day luxuries I enjoy because of modern technology. Things such as sitting down here, writing this blog. Also, I cannot argue with the brilliance of Skype to be able to talk to my family who are many thousands of miles away from me right now.

I guess that the world is a small place these days and it is only going to get smaller in the future, so I should just suck it up and get on with it. Speaking of getting away, it would be really nice if we could all plan a trip, maybe book one of those resorts we went to last year. You know, get the whole gang back together!

Best Music Vids - Black.

2010-01-25T16:55:00.002Z

The eighties was a funny old time for music. Back then, people were busy laughing and saying how crap the seventies had been. Irony. But by the time the second half of the eighties was coming along, people were finally beginning to create some interesting styles. Punk had burnt itself out long ago and New Wave was in its last days. Other, original sounds were needed...

In 1987, Black’s single, ‘Wonderful Life’ was a massive success. It was a Jazz-tinged Pop song with a melancholy feel (normally a winning combination) and people were listening to it everywhere. The song had actually been released back in 1985 on an independent label, but it had just not got the airplay it deserved.

The video to the song is perfect. It was filmed at a British seaside location in striking black and white. You can watch it from two different perspectives; the creative and the mainstream. It has a definite underlying sadness and this is brilliantly put across with a series of incredibly powerful shots. People, rides, scenery, buildings. This was great for those with a thirst for art in film. But it could also be taken at face value. The bog-standard Pop lover is not interested in ‘arty farty’ photography; all they want is a video that is enjoyable to watch. And Black’s video managed to cater for both parts of the audience.

The actors involved were chosen for their faces and they all fit perfectly with the song. One of the best sequences is when the singer is standing in front of a vertical rollercoaster track. As he sings part of the chorus, the ride goes around and looks like a type of ‘carnival halo’ behind his head.

A super-cool video for a super-cool song; it’s just a terrible shame they disappeared into obscurity afterwards. Black had a great sound and could have gone on to produce some really good material.

So before I log off, I have something to admit. I love Claire Bennet (sorry Cynthia). I was going through the last season on dvd well into the night, I mean the acting wasn’t great but man is she hot!

A World of Indifference.

2010-01-07T17:13:00.001Z

Sometimes we all have a moan about people. It may be about a bad habit which they have or the way they behave in general... and it is very common for someone to pipe up with;

‘It would be boring if we were all the same.’

But is this actually true?

If we were all alike then there would not be any more arguments, that is for sure. With us all being the same as one another we would have nothing to disagree about. In fact, it would create an instant unity in the world. All men and women would be in perfect harmony together.

But that is another interesting point, isn’t it? If everyone was the same then where would gender come into it? Or in fact, would gender come into it? I suppose this would depend on what sort of person everyone had become. If we were all clones of a man with a rather macho nature then there would no longer be any real femininity in our world. Imagine if the human face was devoid of all gentleness, softness and delicacy. It doesn’t sound like a very nice place to be; in fact, it sounds pretty cold and harsh...

That could be a very good reason for us all not being the same as one another. When you think about just how bland the world could become, it is suddenly very appealing to live in a place where people have different opinions. After all, having a good debate about something can clear the air and help us to understand things from another person’s point of view.

So it is probably just as well that we are all different after all. The only down side of it is that we have to put up we one other’s annoying habits as well!

As it happens, I occasionally look into online programs as a matter of interest and I have just found a business that does online hr management software. To have everyone logged into the central program seems like a really convenient idea to me, also a huge time saver, I am slightly intrigued why this is the first time it is getting popular.

John Cleese: Who Is This Funny Man

2010-01-06T17:39:00.000Z

Born John Marwood Cleese in Somerset, England, this comedian is well known as a member of the Monty Python comedy crew and also for his role in the Fawlty Towers sitcom where he plays Basil Fawlty.

As a youngster Cleese attended Clifton College in Bristol where he ended up being expelled for a comical defacing of the college grounds. He had painted footsteps on the ground that led from the statue of Field Marshal Douglas Haig to a set of bathrooms, thus suggesting that the field Marshal had gone to the bathroom. Of such was his talent even from back then.

Later he attended Downing College where he started studying law and also where he joined the Cambridge Footlights Revue. His comedic talents were further developed and this is where he would meet Graham Chapman his future comedic writing partner.

As his comedic talent grew he was offered a post with BBC Radio to be one of their writers. Whilst at BBC Radio he worked on shows such as I’m Sorry and I’ll Read That Again. He worked alongside artistes such as Graeme Garden and David Hatch.

When he linked up with the Cambridge Revue to go on tour with them to New York and New Zealand, he remained in New York and performed on and off-Broadway. It was while in New York that he met his future wife, Connie Booth an American actress.

In 1965 Cleese returned to London and with the help of Chapman started doing work on the Frost Report as one of its writers. This comedic satire turned out to be easily one of the best ever in British comedy.

Cleese and his writing partner had developed a very uniquely powerful and funny style of writing that marked them as very different from their peers. They worked on shows such as At Last the 1948 Show and Doctor in the House. Their success eventually led to their own series Monthy Python which is considered one of the best in British comedy.

When he left the Python he did Fawlty Towers which was critically acclaimed. After this series he started doing films and wrote and starred in A Fish Called Wanda.

Last thing guys, I have just realized that I have been glaring at my computer screen for the last couple of hours and am really tired of my House Wallpaper, I think it is time for a change, these and more updates coming soon!

Weighty Thoughts.

2009-12-08T12:51:00.001Z

‘Weight Loss Woes’ is good food for thought (low calorie food, obviously...). We do tend to place an awful lot of importance on how we look and if we are overweight; but should we?

There are all sorts of terrible things going on, both in the world around us, and in our own lives. Should we really be so concerned if we get the odd pimple on our nose or we are a few pounds heavier than our ‘ideal weight’?

Keep everything in perspective. We all want to look and feel good but there are often far more important things to be thinking about.Just the other day in fact I was talking to my cousin and she asked me to visit this site on Smartlipo. I suspect she is actually thinking about getting this done. How do I approach the subject of saying that she shouldn't really go through with it and she should try a natural alternative of taking off weight first?

Love in a Bottle.

2009-11-16T11:58:00.000Z

If you are a single man who is on the lookout for romance then ‘Attracting the Ladies with Pheromone Cologne’ will give you something to think about. Some men are blessed with higher levels of pheromones naturally; these are commonly known as ‘love gods’. When love gods chose to go ‘out on the pull’ lesser mortals were always left to fight over ‘the scraps’. But know that has all changed!

Whilst pheromone cologne is not going to turn you into a revved-up ‘lurve machine’, it will give you a far better chance of meeting that special someone. If a woman is drawn to you enough to talk, then you have a far better chance of getting to know one another.

Zombietubbies.

2009-10-16T14:42:00.000Z

‘Left 4 Dead’ is one of my favorite games at the moment, so when I saw a link to this I just had to have a look. I already found the Teletubbies fairly disturbing before seeing this video and now I am afraid of them turning up in my next nightmare–

There are quite a lot of other characters that could feature in ‘Left 4 Dead’ that would help to bump up the fear factor. Children’s characters can be a little scary anyway; that is probably why so many people get creeped out by clowns. Perhaps someone could introduce some ‘harmless’ characters to ‘Silent Hill’ or ‘Resident Evil’. Imagine versions of these games with the likes of Captain Pugwash, Ronald McDonald or Big Bird in them.

I suppose the Teletubbies are a good choice because they are normally so harmless. In this clip, though, they really do look demonic. It’s just a shame that Noo-Noo wasn’t more involved.

http://www.offworld.com/2009/09/louis-v-laa-laa-the-left-4-tel.html

Quick thing what do you think of the before and afters pictures on the vaser lipo web page, I think she looks worse after! We must have some better ones somewhere.

Wrinkles Be Gone With The Glycolic Acid Peel

2009-09-03T14:44:00.000Z

Ah yes, your turning 30 and you are beginning to notice your first set of wrinkles. Well, this just won't do. So what are your options? You could run out and get yourself a face lift, but that can get really expensive and there are side effects to worry about. Another option you have are those anti-aging creams and while some do work, there are no guarantees that they do that well of a job. This is where chemical peels come in. The glycolic acid peel is a good choice when it comes to chemical peels.

The glycolic acid peel weakens binding properties that hold dead skin cells together and promotes new skin growth underneath. The dead skin cells are gradually removed and younger, healthier skin appears. It is best to do regular glycolic peel treatments to keep replacing the dead old cells with new ones that increasing age and sun exposure leaves behind. You can also do these peels right from the comfort of your home. So, the next time you are looking for ways to reduce fine lines and wrinkles, you could consider giving yourself a glycolic acid peel.

2009-07-22T09:58:00.000Z

I have to say that I am starting to really take notice of my skin (especially my face). My facial skin care is now very important to me. I am a firm believer that if you take measures early to prevent a problem, you can prevent the problem. Well, I have always taking care of my skin with moisturizers and other products that keep my skin soft and smooth. But, now that I am hitting my 40's, I have realized it is time to take my facial skin care a step up and start to use anti aging products as well in my daily skin care regimen.

One particular anti aging skin care cream I like to use is Oil of Olay Firming Cream. This cream is specifically made to regenerate the skin and keep it hydrated. It helps my skin by taking care of any skin flaws or debris on my face and renewing the upper layer of my skin. It helps to smooth away wrinkles and fine lines.

Olay firming cream contains special ingredients that are good for the skin such as water and glycerin. It offers other ingredients that go right to work to help reduce and eliminate the aging process. These ingredients are Niacinamide, Dimethicone, Isopropyl Isostearate, Panthenol, C13 -14 Isoparaffin among many others. You might not have any idea what these ingredients are, but rest assure they work wonders on skin care problems.

Some benefits I have noticed with Olay firming cream are:

* Free Radicals protection
* Refinement of pores
* Exfoliation
* Lifting
* Reducing and eliminating fine lines and wrinkles
* Moisturizing
* And many other benefits

Basically, by using this cream daily, I have noticed a significant change in the appearance of my skin. I have now included it as a natural part of my daily facial skin care. Using this firming cream along with other Olay skin care products as become a big part of my life to help me stay younger looking. Believe me, people are noticing. Especially myself and now I really do not mind my age.

I have to tell you that it feels really good when I still get carded at the age of 38 and see the look of surprise on the cashier's face when they see my actual age on my license. You just can't beat that feeling. Yes, I do believe I will stick to my Olay firming cream.

US Entertainment Gone Weird

2009-04-08T18:11:00.003Z

It’s hard for writers and production companies to come up with a new product to keep us entertained, it really is. But why has ‘true life’ become such a staple in entertainment viewing? From the production view, it makes things a whole lot simpler than they had it before – no scripts, no need to scout locations, no need for lots of things that would go into a normal sitcom, Comedy show or drama production. Well, that’s if you really believe that all these shows are as un-scripted as they would like us to.

Not a day goes by that there isn’t a new ad asking for us to ‘tune in to the latest’ whatever type of show, with only your time and entertainment at stake. So for the companies making these shows it’s a good deal. What about the people on these shows? We’ve all seen an episode or two of the ex-politicians show from Chicago, and really, who could honestly think that all those people actually exist? I mean, there are only so many dwarf lesbian couples cheating on each other in the country, right?

Then we have the shows revolving around ‘celebrity’ lifestyles. Kim who? Why has she got a show? Because she had a sex tape released, and her step-dad used to be famous. Back that with a bit of cosmetic surgery and jobs done. Not because of talent, or a previous stab at fame. Whoever heard of her before that? Not many, I guarantee. But who cares about that anyway? Who cares what she does on a daily or weekly basis? Apparently a lot of people, or the show wouldn’t still be on air. So it’s really our own fault for this lack luster programming lineup we find ourselves with, so buckle up and prepare for more cheap tacky TV from all and sundry, as with everything in the U.S., profit is king.

Good Stress vs Bad Stress - Avoiding more wrinkles!

2009-01-02T09:54:00.001Z

For years I have worked for other people, having to do what they tell me to. I've had to listen to the belittling comments about "why haven't you finished yet? It is enough to add wrinkles to my outward appearance that I was considering Wrinkle Removal. Ha Ha Ha - wrinkle removal at my age of 36? You are asking yourself - Is she kidding right? No I am not kidding. The amount of wrinkles and gray hair I received from this one job are more then those I've received from being a parent.

I worked as an accounting clerk for a local travel destinations company in Vancouver, before leaving it to have an raise my children. Adding to the stress of an unreasonable boss, was the two hour drive I had to take to and from work. When I arrived home from work every day I was tired, hungry and almost always GRUMPY!!! I am surprised I wasn't addicted to the pain relieving medication I would take on a daily basis for the headaches.

The stress was beginning to really take its toll when I found out I was pregnant with my second son. The stress of it all was beginning to affect every aspect of my life. A normally bubbly and energetic woman, I was becoming very moody and depressed. My peaches and cream complexion was beginning to give me troubles to. I wasn't used to having problem skin and acne.

Eventually the stress had taken so much of a toll on my life that my husband, a wonderful and supportive man, told me to see my doctor about going on stress leave. Once I was home, and did not have to worry about work and commuting to work - the stress just seemed to fly away. It's funny how if you take the cause of the stress out of the situation, your problems just disappear. I am not saying I don't have stress now - but it's a stress that I don't need to run away from.

The Rules of Friendship

2008-10-27T15:17:00.001Z

It has recently been reported in the papers that the secret of personal happiness is to have at least ten friends. How lovely it is to have friends - to be loved - to have people to call on in your hour of need - to have such social support is obviously fabulous and I basked briefly in a warm glow of contentment, knowing that I indeed have at least ten friends.

I had to keep checking on my fingers because some of them I counted twice. These were mates who had seen me drunk and yet they still kept in touch. Then there were those who I could never even ring unless I was in full make-up and perhaps could only be classed as acquaintances, but I used the "Do I always remember their birthday and do they always remember my birthday" rule and usually they ended up in the group.

However then I looked at the word "happiness" and it occurred to me that it may be that it was not so much that their contact brought me personal happiness but that it made me forget my own troubles. Now you think what a sweet person I am - I worry about the well-being of all my friends. Oh no! It is more to do with the effort one has to put into the relationship in terms of being polite! When it comes to family members you can say what you like to them in the knowledge that they will probably forgive you in the end - because you love them but the love between friends is not so all encompassing. Hurt feelings will take much longer to heal and you cannot necessarily relax and say just what you think.

For example, one of my friends of thirty years standing has started to suffer from Hair Loss. She only has tiny wisps of hair over a large part of her crown but she had grown her remaining wispy grey hair down to her shoulders. When I met up with her the phrase 'Absent minded professor' kept screaming through my brain. "How well you look" I said. This was essentially true but "Aargh, What has happened to your hair?" is what I wanted to say. We sat down in the restaurant, the candle-light gleaming off her shiny pate "Aargh! What has happened to your hair" I wanted to say but what came out was "Shall we have a starter or go straight to the main course?" Finally she said that she was sadly beginning to lose her hair and that it was genetic and still I said "Oh I hadn't noticed, I thought you were looking really well!"

So you see that night I did not give a thought to any of my own problems but if real happiness comes from honesty and truth, I failed.

I lost my phone!

2008-07-23T11:01:00.002Z

It was a wonderful day in London. A day full of joy and happiness. But I didn’t even think that something bad is going to happen.

I was in my way back home, I thought of my friends who were all with me today. A sudden thought crossed my mind to check the time, “Oh! No, it’s getting late for my train. I have to be in the station within five minutes”. But not a big deal, as I was somewhere fifty yards far away from the station.
I got my tickets loaded myself into the train just in time. I was late for a photography workshop that I was attending, so I was glad I made it on as the trains are only every half an hour. The train started moving. Won’t it be beautiful to see the dark streets with the moving lights in the front of the vehicles?
I heard a sound of a ringtone it’s from nowhere but my coat. That was my mobile. That was a call from my father from Birmingham. It has been a long time since I spoke to my father.
Now I think about the mobile. Oh! It was gifted to me by my father before two years, when I started my career. Now it is two years it is great.
What does it not have. Camera, Audio player, SMS, MMS, Internet, Mailing, Video Capture. It was a cute black colored one with all accessories.

This is when my bad time started. I just fell asleep keeping the mobile in my hand. I didn’t notice that my mobile slipping down. I didn’t know what happened to my mobile after that.
I was still sleeping even not knowing that the train has reached its station. Suddenly a passenger nearby me woke me up to inform me that the train has reached the station in which I have to get off. By an instinct I started to search my mobile. “Oh! What a bad luck I lost it” I wouldn’t have worried about paying the penalty of getting down in the next station. But now I am out of the train. I don’t know what would have happened to my mobile.

Please god please get my mobile back to me. My mobile has a “T” symbol in the right side panel. People, if anybody sees a mobile they should hand it into the police. As someone who has lost their phone, I now know how it feels to loose their phone. It’s not nice.

The rising cost of learning to drive

2008-06-09T11:04:00.002Z

Yet again at my local filling station yesterday diesel is up another 1p. It's now reached £1.27p per litre and that's the cheapest in the area by far. As a Driving Instructor I find this most frustrating and of course I will have to pass this increase in expenses on to my already hard pressed customers. Other factors have already pushed that up. The rising cost of lead has doubled the price of things like car batteries, and the general cost of the maintaining the nuts and bolts of the vehical has to be paid for by my clients.

To add to their woes the Driving Standards Agency has announced that they are going to close our local test centre as part of a policy of building new multi purpose test centres, capable of handling all the local area exams.

There has been no consultation about this decision and even after questions were raised in the house of commons by our local MP, this arbitrary decision is still to go ahead with no regard to the needs of learner drivers in this area whatsoever. In fact I received a letter yesterday to inform me that the test centre will now close six weeks sooner than was originally reported.

As things are at the moment we have to travel 7 miles to our nearest centre, but when this closes we will have a 50 mile round trip the the next nearest one. This will greatly increase the time needed and the expense as lessons will have to be considerably longer.

In the last year the theory test has increased in price by £9, the practical test by £8 and with the driving test in this country being one of the hardest in Europe, learning to drive now has become a huge undertaking.

I live in a rural town where driving is an essential of modern life, most people having to commute to work. Because of this not driving is not an option and yet the very agency that I thought was there to serve and help the new driver, seems to be ignoring their needs and creating unnecessary hardship.

(I saw this fringe comedy show last week, and promisied them a shout out. So here it is. Shout!)

The One About the Pub Quiz

2008-03-28T13:49:00.005Z

Every Tuesday I meet up with my old retail workmates for a pub quiz. It's good fun, with regularly themed questions. For instance, there's the food taste round, where we sample a dish and have to guess the ingredients; the underground question, where we get given a clue, each for 3 underground stations and solve them; the movie connection round, where we are given the title of 3 movies, and have to name the actor / actress that links them. We do really well, and have even got first place a few times.

Recently one of my other friends, Mike, who I went to school with, invited me along to the pub quiz he goes to. I hadn't seen him for a while, and I figured a different venue would make a nice change, so I gratefully accepted. Different venue - check. Different quiz - check. Different social group - check. What could wrong? I'm glad you asked. For starters, the walk to the pub was a good 30 minutes in the pouring rain. Then, to my amazement, I discover this was an entirely new breed of pub quiz - I hardly knew any of the answers. In fact, most of it was current affairs, which isn't really my area of expertise - I'm more about music and general knowledge. So I pretty much sat out of it from the get-go, until we got a question I actually knew an answer to, only to get beaten to the punch by the other smarter members of the group.

Mike's friends are all professional workers with degrees, and are a friendly bunch. Except for Claudia, that is. Well, let's put it this way, I wouldn't want to go looking for a house for sale in Gloucestershire with her. Claudia is friendly, if somewhat dominating, towards the people in her clique, but if you happen to be an outsider, like yours truly, she won't give you the time of day. She struck me as the type of person who's used to getting things her way all the time, has no room or patience for compromise, and owns... oh, I dunno, a plastic surgery credit card, or something like that :) At the end of the evening (we didn't win) I said farewell. Everyone else politely said goodbye, while Claudia gave a dismissive wave of her hand without even looking up, like she was shooing away a fly. In my humble opinion, a week of corporate soft skills training for her would be no bad thing. Needless to say, I won't be going back to that pub quiz. Think I'll stick with my usual.

Through the eyes of a market trader

2007-11-13T12:43:00.001Z

A market is often a place to watch the world go by and to go hunt for a bargain as well as being a setting where you could find many objects that you would not often get elsewhere. Once beyond the confines of Portobello and Camden, there are bargains to be had and joys to behold. However, as a part-time market trader, my views on the markets are very different from that of the customer.

Set up early in the morning, long before the sun rises in order to secure a spot. Get out your stall and watch the mist condense on your goods. One thing that often worries a trader are their neighbours. It is the one thing that every trader is wary of early in the morning. Let us take an ordinary market on the outskirts of West London. I was joined by an elderly Sikh gentleman who has been trading for many years. Everything on his stall for a pound and still, people badger him for bargains. To my right, a quiet man with a scar who sold designer handbags at prices to make your eyes pop out.

Opposite myself was where the life of the market place was unfolding. There was a large stall selling men’s fashion, guarded and guided by two elderly Kashmiri gentlemen. To the left of them was a stall selling Islamic literature and DVD’s. To wideboys from ‘South of the River’ were selling rap-orientated clothing next to them.

At first, everyone was sizing each other up. After all, these are potential competitors. But as the day goes on, and everyone starts trading, we all realise one thing - the customer is fickle and it is them against us. By the end of the day, as the stalls are packed up and we grumble about our losses, handshakes are exchanged, a few smiles are there on the faces of the lucky ones and everyone leaves as friends.

Until the next market day.

Nano-Nano

2007-11-08T09:00:00.001Z

It’s that time of year again. Today thousands of writers are sharpening their pencils and cleaning their desktop as the annual fiction writing marathon known as Nanowrimo (Nano for short) crosses the starting line. Can you write 50,000 words of a novel in a month, the month of November to be exact? That’s the challenge posed by Chris Baty and his crew, and there are writers all over the world who think they can. From all corners of the earth, there’s a common bond of fiction bringing writers together as they work on their individual projects.

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It doesn’t sound as difficult as it is really. 50,000 words isn’t quite 1500 words a day which isn’t much for a seasoned writer, but where it falls apart is when the plot you’ve decided on doesn’t quite work out the way you thought it would – or your child comes down with flu – or your boss gives you an additional work project needing urgent attention – or ––and the list goes on! Many of the thousands who begin the challenge won’t complete it, but they leave with a feeling of achievement for what they did accomplish and a vow that next year they’ll try again and they will succeed.

This will be my fourth attempt at the Nano challenge, and this time I’m armed with a better plot, a lot more motivation to complete it, and I’ve even got my official Nanowrimo t-shirt to prove I’m taking part. I’ve got a schedule to keep my word count on track, and a cast list to tell me who my characters are and what they look like. Now all I need to do is keep the children healthy, and my work stuff under control, and I’ll be fine – right up to the point where the plot becomes unstuck because of something I hadn’t taken into consideration. When you think about it, it’s a bit like life really!

At least I am a Gemini

2007-11-07T13:22:00.001Z

The horoscope pages are in just about every newspaper you see from national right down to the local press. Everyday, some guy called ‘Ed Balls’ or ‘Mystic Mary’ will predict with some degree of inaccuracy the day ahead for each 1/12th of the population. Each day, countless thousands will make a bee line for these hallowed pages near the back of the newspapers and ponder how the day will end and how they can alter the bad news about to hit them at the office or in their relationship today.

Personally, I think it is a load of old cobblers. If someone asks what my sign is, I usually challenge them to guess. Almost always, they get it wrong. But there is one thing I am glad about the whole horoscope farce and that is what my actually zodiac sign is. For there are many that would actually be quite dull and boring. Often people think that I am a Capricorn - oh please, am I that boring! Or a Leo, maybe due to my ferocious personality. I have even had a couple guess that I am a Cancer, maybe due to my tough exterior.

A few people have guessed correctly that I am a Gemini. A lot are genuinely surprised and a few sheepishly avoid eye contact. However, it is probably the one sign that everyone has heard of. No one can really define the characteristics of those born under Taurus or a Picean. However, anyone who knows a little about the zodiac, knows about the twins.

And although I do not subscribe to the whole charade of the zodiac, I do like being witty, virile, generally exciting and being able to multitask, or so are my attributes according to my horoscope. I am also quite happy at being two faced and back stabbing as at least I will be interesting to anyone that meets me.

So while I think that next week’s prediction of me becoming better in the bedroom is a load of old tosh, I do like the fact that amongst the other 11/12ths of the population, I at least have one great personality in which to revel in my life.

An idea for road safety

2007-10-21T09:31:00.001Z

Billboards, they can be a wondrous thing. A pleasure to the eye when you are driving along. And during the summer, one of the larger chains in Britain have been advertising their range of underwear and swimwear on various models. Once I was driving through what is normally a busy intersection. However, all the cars were proceeding at the nice, slow pace. There was no road rage and everyone seemed quite content at poodling through this normally hazardous junction. Of course it helped that there was a fifteen foot poster of a lady in a bikini, emerging from the sea.

Maybe there is something for road safety officers to take a look into. Instead of speed cameras and traffic calming measures that infuriate the motorist, maybe the answer lies in measures that trick rather than force the driver into slowing down. Such posters and advertising would also help to combat the stress experienced by road users on the increasingly crowded streets of Britain. Best of all, none of these would have to be funded by the public purse as advertisers would sponsor such schemes in order to get their product sold. The old association of sexiness and driving could in fact provide the perfect combination to safer streets, happier drivers and in this environmentally conscious age, lower fuel consumption due to less speeding. A win-win situation.

Sure there would be detractors from this great idea. Some would call the idea sexist. Other would say that it demeans women. However, none of these calls were heard when women were used to advertise these products. I think that helping the cause of road safety would be something that any sane person would support, despite the arguments that would originate from those that do not have the common sense to see the bigger picture.

Meanwhile, I will just keep on driving at a reasonable pace past those wonderful posters. Anything to bring safety to these streets.

Stong bad is still Strong!

2007-09-18T12:41:00.000Z

I was running through old emails and I found a link to an old blog post on funny email advice. The post is old written back in 2005 from a site I used to use called coffee pop. Anyway – it was my first introduction to strong bad!

Strong bad is a cartoon character – the premise of the cartoon is very simple – every episode he answers an email to hilarious consequence. I remember watching it and loving it – and for a good few months I followed strong bad’s adventures regularly. Like everything, eventually I wondered off the site to other things. Well, I’ve looked back at the site and it’s still running. Not only is it still running – it’s thriving.

The site now not only has what must be a hundred ‘email’ episodes and a whole load of extras! You can play strong bad related games, buy t-shirts and caps from the store, and download a load of quite cool plug ins.

I watched a few episodes and the character base has gotten a lot bigger since I watched it – but the old favourites are still there. The cheet still goes around saying nothing understandable, strong sad is still pathetic and strong mad still grunts and hits things!

One of the things I really appreciate, is in his (or her) success, the creator of strong bad hasn’t tried to move it away from its winning formula. The episodes all still begin with an email that has been sent in by a viewer, and with strong bad reading it out (and often mispronouncing the writers name). White underpants still make a guest appearance now and then, and there is still occasional music and random bursts of song writing.

I was strangely pleased that Strong Bad was not only still going strong, but more popular than ever. We all spend a certain amount of time wasted on looking at things on the internet to little consequence, and knowing that it has become something of an institution in itself somehow makes me feel less like I was wasting valuable work time whilst watching it instead of being productive.

Anyway - I’m going to get back to researching home information packs like I was supposed to be doing when I logged on. There’s been a whole change in the law when you sell your house and I need to make sure that I can... but you know what this is boring you now. Stop reading this and go here and watch some strong bad emails. You won’t regret it!

Why One Eye Could Make John Alan a Fortune

2007-08-31T11:29:00.001Z

I’ve got a theory as to why Johnny A is such a movie nut. For those of you who don’t know him, John is a friend who works currently as a manager of an Odeon, and from childhood he has only had one working eye. Modern surgery means his glass eye is very realistic and so he suffers from none of the social problems a man with one eye might have experienced a hundred years ago, however he has no depth perception. Everything that he see’s in life he sees in 2 dimensions, not 3. To him a set of downward sloping stairs looks similar to a flat floor with lines in it.

So why does he love films? Films are 2 dimensional, so to most of us they don’t look exactly real despite how realistic they are. We as watchers ‘suspend our disbelief’ for the length of the film in order that we can enjoy watching it more. For John that suspension is so much less because for him the films DO look exactly the same as they do in ‘real life’. For a man that sees in 2 dimensions, the flat screen of a two dimensional film displays images that look exactly the same as the day to day images that he sees. Thus it is that his experience of films like “The Terminator” or “Pirates of the Carabean” or “Lord of the Rings” is so much more complete than ours. Many of his friends in the past may have looked upon his lack of an eye as a disability. I have never seen it that way. For me it gives him a unique perspective that no normal man has – almost like a super power! He has an ability that allows him not only to enjoy films more than the average man, but also to potentially make films better than the average director because he can already see things exactly as the camera would! Watch out Kevin Smith and Christopher Gans, I’ve a man with the potential to surpass you both!

Burning The House Down!

2007-06-27T13:46:00.001Z

So I’m in hotel room. In an effort to save money I borrowed a small camping type stove from a friend. Now understand, this is a bit of a semi holiday weekend for me as well, so the cooker was mostly about being able to cook up outside and the like. You know, in parks and outside in the sun and stuff. Just two days ago being able to have a cooked lunch on a small island in the middle of a lake was just excellent! Anyhow, I wasn’t too careful about positioning the pan and stove, and I forgot that mushrooms emit a sightless smoke when the lighting isn’t direct... Half way through heating my tinned spaghetti (Hinez I might add!) I get a knock on the door. “Just a minute while I get some trousers on!” I shout as I turn everything off. It’s the duty manager looking in a bit of an emotional state asking if I’ve got something smoking in the room... I tell her straight out that I’m cooking. She tells me that the fire alarms are about to go off... That is when the fire alarms go off! The entire building is evacuated, guests and staff alike, I try and apologise and explain but get told to go to the fire meet point and “I’ll speak to you afterwards”. I felt like a school kid being told that the head master wanted to see me to tell me off after school. Oh man... And that’s when the first fire engine turned up, sirens wailing. I say first because it was closely followed by a second. I’ve got to give it to the fire services for their prompt arrival. I was a little disappointed as it was at least a minute more before the fire support vehicle showed up, but hey who’s splitting hairs eh?

Anyhow, when it was all over (I heard a women explain that she had to run out of the shower) I had to ‘go and see the duty manager’ I think her name was Christine. She was very annoyed, and I did the only thing I could in that situation which was to eat a lot of pie (humble). I apologised profusely – I think I even used the words “I want to apologise profusely”. Anyhow, she’s confiscated the stove and stuff for the moment as part of the agreement to let me stay here for the rest of the week.

The moral of the story? That’s one of the problems. I can’t seem to figure the moral out, which is what truly worries me. See, most people make mistakes and then learn from them, and perhaps most people would say the learning here is that you really should never NEVER use a stove inside a hotel room. What I take from this is that if you’re going to use a stove, next time use it actually on the window ledge itself so that there is no chance of setting of the alarms.

Is that wrong?

Ever heard of microdermabra sion? Well neither have I but apparently the

stars use it to make themsleves look 10 years younger, and we at work now get a special rate at the local clinic for it. Myah is thinking about reaching into her pocket for once and trying to make herself more beautiful. Good luck to her.

Everyone should work from home

2007-06-01T13:21:00.001Z

Wouldn't it be great if everyone worked from home? Think about it. You could cook your own lunch quickly and easily. You could look after your kids and keep your job. You could have a pet and look after it properly.

You'd also save so much TIME. The hour in the morning going in and the hour coming back would no longer be needed. That's 10 extra hours a week you'd have to use - that's like turning a 5 day week into a 6day week! That's a 20% increase in days! With the increase in technology it would even be practical in many jobs. If people needed to have meetings, they could turn into discos or dinner parties afterwards. I really think that everyone should be alowed to work from home. Infact, it should be a new government initiative!

I like Browns face

2007-06-01T10:03:00.001Z

I'm going to go out on a limb here, alienate all my friends by making a political comment based on no facts and just my opinion. I think gorden brown is going to be a good man to lead our country for awhile. Is it because I think he has a real sense of global poverty and the way in which countrys like ours can help? Is it because he definatly has a handle on the ingoings and out goings of the countrys money situation? No. It's because I like his face. Have a look at it, it really is a good one. Not handsome or stunning in any way - but solid. I think thats what we need in a leader. Someone solid.

Margaret is crusing for a brusing! Once again, can we do something more with the overseas property page.
I think the new design they're proposing is awful, never mind, no point in moaning, you know?

Recycling or Die!

2007-05-31T15:53:00.001Z

My recycling box’s blew away in the wind ages ago and the council still haven't given us new ones. So yesterday morning I snuck out the house first thing, put my bins out, and then very slowly and carefully I went from neighbors box to neighbors box quietly adding a small amount of my rubbish to theirs till all mine were gone and every box in my street was slightly bigger - hopefully not noticeably. Now I'm not quite sure why, but I felt like some kind of thief! I really think that it's important to recycle, and I'm sure that no one would have minded, yet I felt really sneaky!

Then last night I had the a dream. It was night time, I was sneaking my crap into other people's boxes when there was a creaking noise...! I turned around and there stood one of my neighbours in his doorway, jaw hanging slightly slack, his eyes red from lack of sleep and huge black eye bags. I was scared. I stuttered, tried to explain when he started to walk towards me. It was then I realised, he wasn't just tired.. he was a zombie!! I backed off only to find the rest of the street coming out their houses arms outstretched all going to attack me because I had used their box's without asking! I was surrounded!! As they closed in on me they all chanted "kill the earth, kill the earth, kill the earth". I knew if I just threw the last of my rubbish on the ground and littered, things would be fine, for it was the refuse they were attracted to! But I wouldn't, I couldn't bring my self to pollute the Earth. And just before I was overwhelmed by the circle of death I thrust my hand into the air, still holding my half crushed Tesco 2 litre plastic milk carton and cried....

RECYCLE OR DIE!!!!

Bob is going to drive me crazy one day, keeps asking if we can go over the equine insurance page.
I just don't think it's worth our time to... Hai Ram! Nothings ever going to change anyway, eh?

Spiderman

2007-05-25T10:02:00.001Z

I enjoyed the new spiderman movie, I did. I didn't enjoy it as much as the others but it was good. The thing that means I can't really comment that well is because I was sitting right at the front of the cinema. I mean front row. It meant that during all the big fight sequences I couldn't actually work out what was going on - I was just too close. It meant I got a real sense of the panic and confusion of the fights, but I think I'd have enjoyed it more as an audience member if I'd not been quite as close!

Cherryl has demanded that we have another look at the cyst removal clinic section.
ARGH!!! One of these days I'm going to... But hey, I think what I need to do, is win the lottery next week, aye!?

Melanie Brown insists that Eddie Murphy is the father of her baby

2007-05-03T09:55:00.001Z

Scary Spice Melanie Brown, wants to take Eddie Murphy to court and force him to take a paternity test. She say to ‘People’ magazine:

"He's not doing a DNA test and he's not signing the birth certificate. So it's going to have to go to court so he can be forced to do it, which is strange since he was the one asking for it."

If I were Eddie Murphy I’d give her whatever she wants, to just keep the secret of us having sex! That baby is a dirty trick to prove to the world that Eddie’s standards are incredibly low, if she can in fact prove it is his!

Disinterested in studying- Thats what boys feel!!

2007-04-23T13:51:00.001Z

Less than half as many boys as girls have applied for summer schools that give them a flavour of university life. A scheme run by the Sutton Trust educational charity aims to encourage students from poorer backgrounds. But this year 1,467 girls applied and only 670 boys. Founder Sir Peter Lampl said: "Maybe they are too shy." Figures due out next week from the UK university admissions service are likely to show 44% of those applying for degree courses this year are boys. A decade ago it was 46%. Those who are most likely to be given places are 16 and 17-year-olds from non-privileged backgrounds whose parents are in non-professional occupations and did not go to university themselves. Applicants from schools which do not normally send many students on to higher education are also given preference. Boys represented less than a third (31 but nothing like as much as the charity had hoped. Some people have suggested that the gender gap may simply reflect the availability of relatively well paid jobs for young men.

Boys think differently, boys think out of the world...But dont want to study. That sounds something strange. The statistics reveal that boys have been significantly dropping in number for the application to schools and universities. There has been link to the gender gap as well, as to less availability of well paid jobs to boys or young men. Why all this happeneing?? Hey boys come on...We cannot fall out of the race to girls. Girls are indeed marching ahead but you prople also need to get along. You are considered to be the bread winner of the house. But thats a past now. Even many girls are doing that job. But there is this thing of self respect which no boy will want to compromise. This sudden disinterest of the boys should be considered not too light but seriously by the educational aujtorities and promote them to be in line with the progressing world.

More data can be found on this issue by simply following this link: http://news.Bbc.Co.Uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/6577249.Stm

On a positive note.Wendy has finally re-designed the cheap pet insurance pages

2007-04-11T11:41:00.000Z

Lindsay Lohan wears underwear!

Lindsay Lohan turned up at Katsuya in a first for her, she was wearing underwear! We know this because she was wearing little else. Most people don’t need to go to such extremes to convince people of these simple things. But not our Lindsay. She can now official create news by dressing herself appropriately in the morning. I think we should celebrate the less of her drunken naked form on our press the better. God that slut is hypnotic, it like a car crash that you can’t turn away from. You know you shouldn't be staring and the wounded bloddy disfigured bodies, but you can't help it exspecality when they are doing to them selfs.

2007-04-08T14:25:00.000Z

Brad and Angelina are getting another brat

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When will the baby insanity end? Brad and Angelina want to adopt a Vietnamese boy, and have already filled the adoption papers. Does this woman need to have a collection? Beware kids, next she’s gonna want one from his parents, as a new item… ‘I have a kid of my own, a bunch of abandoned ones, and now I want one from a loving family!� Yeah… she’d probably like that, she really enjoys wrecking families! Angelina, you’re beautiful, but quite vulgar! On the other hand, Jenifer Aniston was beautiful and had class. But what can we expect from pretty boy, Brad Pitt?

Angelina, I know you have a passion for collecting … human beings, but be aware that they will grow up some day and escape… And they’ll probably kill you! On second thought… Keep it up! Don’t give up on your dream! Yeah… Even though you’ll fill the world with spoiled brats, at least the world will be rid of you!

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under tight military protection

2007-04-06T10:22:00.000Z

Joe Francis finally got what he deserves!

�Girls gone wild’ producer Joe Francis got punched in the head Saturday night at Cameo in Miami after he was hitting on a group of Brazilian models and a jealous boyfriend took offense. That punch is now a symbol of justice in the world! And nobody knows what happened to the guy who punched him. The authorities probably want to locate him and give him a medal of honor, for initiating something that I pray will continue until all the stupid celebrities in the universe get just what they deserve… a well placed punch in the head! I just wish it could’ve been me! And not for the merit, just for the satisfaction of getting to inflict pain on such a disgusting person! Wherever and whoever he is, I only wish good things for that man!

2007-04-04T09:14:00.000Z

Tara Reid is beyond vulgar!

Tara Reid is a talent lacking little creep that pollutes television just for the sake of wasting everybody’s time including her own! She has an awful voice, it makes me want to quit smoking every time I hear her speak, and her body is the last thing even the most perverted person in the universe would want to see! Still she exposes it frequently and proudly… Tara, get a clue! She was spotted in Acapulco over the weekend testing her bikini top in extreme breaking situations! Thus she has reached such a high level of vulgarity that we’ll just have to think for a brand new word for her! Her bra was squeezing her breasts so tightly, that you’d think she stole it from an undeveloped nine-year-old girl! It was absolutely grotesque! What’s Tara trying to do? Make it in the world’s ugliest people top ten? Because I’ll give her that! If the smashed boobs wouldn’t be enough, she has the worst abs! I mean, this girl needs a serious workout, she is horribly ugly! And on top of it she’s not very bright! If I looked like her, I’d definitely stay dressed! On a more positive note.Esther suggested I change IPL skin rejuvenation treatment pages

2007-04-02T09:20:00.000Z

Lindsay Lohan doesnâ��t like wearing a bra

Lindsay was spotted in LA not wearing a bra, fact so very obvious through her t-shirt. And again the mail crown drools over cold hard silicon that is placed underneath human skin. And also there’s the blonde hair, which makes it better though I don’t really know how, sine nobody notices what’s below or under the chest area! For Lindsay it isn’t such an uncommon thing to not wear a bra! People have already seen more of her than they actually want. If she’d really want to shock the world she should say something smart! Just out of the blue! Even I’d be wondering in amazement for a while! And yet the chances of that happening are lower than a solar eclipse, a full moon eclipse, Eminem hating his daughter and God coming to earth to stare at Lindsay’s boobs… taking place… all at once! So since you know it won’t help you, Lindsay, for the sake of your fictional dignity, please, put a bra on!

On a more positive note.Gillian has finally redesigned the sculptra face lift part

2007-03-28T16:16:00.001Z

Rain of Fines For Talking while Driving!!

More than 246 drivers a day have been fined for using a hand-held mobile phone while driving since laws were toughened one month ago. At least 6,891 people in England and Scotland have been fined £60 and - for the first time - had three points added to their licence. Research by The Press Association revealed that £413,460 is due to be paid in fines - twice what would have been paid under earlier legislation. But the true figure could be far higher as many forces, including the UK's largest, the Metropolitan Police, did not provide figures. On February 27, the fixed-penalty fine for offenders doubled to £60 and those caught also faced three penalty points on their licence for the first time. Courts were also given powers to give a maximum fine of £1,000 or £2,500 in the case of a driver of a bus, coach or goods vehicle.

The alarming rates of increase in these incidents leads to one major thing- Dreadful accidents on the roads. I don't understand why people talk while they drive. I mean is it really that important than your own life?? What could happen if they did not attend some calls while they are driving?? The answer to the question is "Nothing". If the calls are so urgent they can simply park the vehicle to one side and talk instead of driving and endangering others as well as their lives. The initiative taken by the police and courts is simply appreciative, because this move is for the safety of people and reducing the number of freak road accidents.

So people just dont go ahead and talk merrily while driving because you are simply taking the sole responsibility of taking someone's life by doing that including yours. Urgent calls should be attended by parking your vehicle to one side of the road ensuring safety for all. We can get more information regarding this issue by simply following the link: http://news.Sky.Com/skynews/article/0,,30000-1257661,00.Html

On a more positive note.Allen has finally redesigned the microsclerotherapy clinic part

2007-03-28T16:16:00.000Z

Bruce Willis must’ve gone blind

Bruce Willis turned 52 recently, and as any man his age started getting old, started losing the sharpness of senses such as… sight! Yes, that, or the desperation of being single at his age made him lower his standards… below sea level! He was spotted making out with none other than Courtney Love at Roxy on Sunset Blvd. The hero of countless stories has lost the respect of his public for ever! Unless he comes up with a really good excuse like being wasted or something, he’s fans will probably never admit to having looked up to him ever again! I mean, common man, the fact that you’re a little old can’t get you this low. The way I remember you, you’ll turn out to be the sexiest grey fox in Hollywood! Or bold, whatever… I’m truly sorry I had to say this about you, but I have no choice but to try and remember you as you used to be!

2007-03-28T15:16:00.000Z

Improving Criminals- A nice initiative!!!

Prime minister Mr.Tony Blair, has announced that Career criminals will have restrictions placed on their activities after they are released from prison. He added prolific offender licences - punishable by up to three years in jail if breached - were "not an alternative to prison, (but) in addition to prison".Powers to seize ill-gotten gains would be extended to cover assets including cars, he added. There are 20,000 more prison places than there were in 1997 and building another 8,000 is in progress which was again added by the PM. "We have to ensure that, when people leave prison, they do not rebound straight back in" he said.

I feel that the actions taken at improving the nature and behaviors of the criminals which constitues a tiny minority of UK's population are a part of shake-up aimed at changing the behavior. We can see many mixed reactions on these initiatives. Most of the times, it may be possible that the society may not accept such elements , but on the other hand we cannot give up on them cxompletely. This is because, they too are an integral part of the society. Not everybody is born criminal, Society makes them. So we have to clearly make a balance between the criminals and normal people. If the balance gap is more criminals are again drawn towards crime.

I think with more resources like money and infrastructure government can implement rehabilitation clinics for criminals to be a normal part of the society. We can see more light on this initiative by following the link: http://news.Sky.Com/skynews/article/0,,30000-1257660,00.Html

Ow on a work front.Michael has completely re-designed the HIP part

2007-03-27T10:41:00.000Z

Mel Gibson lost it

Mel Gibson apparently went crazy again at Cal State Northridge when a Mayan culture expert accused him that his presentation of the Mayan society in the movie ‘Apocalypto’ is not accurate. He was giving a presentation on the movie and afterwards the crowd was allowed to ask questions. An Assistant Professor of Central American Studies asked if Mel had read about Mayan culture before shooting the film and Gibson said he had. Then she pushed even further, saying his representations of Mayan sacrificial ceremonies and bloodlst were racist. Mel responded, "Lady, Fuck off." Then members of the Mayan community protested on how they were portrayed in the film and as they escorted from the room by event organizers Mel screamed at them "Make your own movie!"

It’s amazing how he grew over the anger management classes he took, almost brings tears to the eye! I don’t even know what to say… well, actually I do, but I don’t really want to lower myself to his level! I never really liked Mel, but now I guess I’m not the only one any more!

2007-03-23T14:14:00.000Z

Roman Catholic Church Turns Drama Queen

Parliament’s decision not to amend the Equality Act (sexual orientation) Regulations should be a big dose of reality for the Roman Catholic Church. A religion that has been steeped in controversy over child sexual abuse claims in recent years, obviously believing that all gay people have the same urges as the priests who have molested young people in their congregations. That would be no! Most gay people are just like straight people, they have a partner they love, and home that would welcome a child that they are otherwise unable to have themselves because of the sexual path they walk.

I appreciate that the Catholic Church is a little behind the times and still believes that being gay is a lifestyle choice, rather like choosing what kind of car to drive, but it’s about time it opened its eyes. Homosexuality isn’t chosen, and it’s not contagious. It’s something you’re born with. Living in a home with a gay couple won’t make a straight child gay unless the child already possesses the genes! There are too many children needing a home, and the adoption process needs to have an equal playing field so that all people who are capable of offering a good home to a child who needs it has the same chance of doing so.

And what about the children? Don’t children living in care deserve a loving home with parents who care about them? Don’t they deserve better than the system can provide? Why is it that the Church thinks it’s better that a child live in a home where it’s given nothing more than the bare essentials, rather than living in a home with two mothers or two fathers? Would it prefer it if that child was adopted by a straight couple who were addicted to crack cocaine? Threatening to close its adoption agencies on principle is a bit of a drama queen tactic to get publicity to its cause – there are many ways they could quietly block any couple from adopting a child if it chose to do so, as plenty of unsuccessful straight childless couples have found out!

The children who are in the care of a same sex couple will only experience prejudice and bullying at school as long as there are narrow-minded bigots being influenced by public institutions who should be doing more to enable harmony than create publicity making controversy. Children don’t need controversy – they need unconditional love and if there are gay people out there who can provide that, the Church needs to leave well alone and deal with the mess-ups that their own priests have made with regards to their dealings with children.

Things seem good on the work front.
Alexis has redesigned the thread veins treatments part

2007-03-21T11:20:00.000Z

Snow in March?

Whether they’ll blame it on El Niño or Global Warming, if an article on Sky News is to be believed (see http://news.Sky.Com/skynews/article/0,,30100-1256119,00.Html), many of us across the UK Can expect a return to winter this weekend – with gales, hail storms and snow expected to remain with us through to Wednesday of next week.

With many of our leading media outlets reporting on the UK’s proposals to reduce carbon emissions by 60% by 2050 (see http://news.Bbc.Co.Uk/2/hi/uk_news/politics/6444145.Stm?Ls), some could argue that the weather could not have chosen a better week to bite back and plunge the UK Firmly back in winter. Although snow and hail in March is not unheard of in the UK, where we can frequently experience brief measures of all four seasons in day, the weather forecast for this weekend certainly seems to be putting a dampener on NASA’s claims that the Earth is now the warmest it has been for 12,000 years! (see http://news.Bbc.Co.Uk/2/hi/uk_news/politics/6045680.Stm)

On a far more serious note will be whether or not the Government see this weekend’s predicted weather for what it truly is: another burden on the elderly and less well-off, who we can only expect would have hoped that the high energy costs of winter were now firmly behind them and may be reluctant to heat themselves sufficiently without some form of Government undertaking that they’ll at least pick-up part of the bill.

Ow on a work front.
Check out the design on the perlane part

2007-03-14T11:00:00.000Z

School Councils a must for benefit of Students as well as the school....is it???

There has been a rising voice from the school fraternity as well as student's fraternity to have School Councils, so that students can voice their views and ideas on the appointment of teachers and even running the school. In turn, entry of school councils will help the students taking part in democratic issue too. As specified by the academicians at the Institute of Education at London University, the government should make school councils compulsory. Councils provide students with better opportunities both to participate in democratic, representative practices, such as elections, and to effect change in their school environments.

But what i think is that government should not impose this thing on the teachers or schools. It should be left to the schools to decide whether to implement this council inclusion rule or not. Definitely councils enable the students to grow as a better citizen for the country, it also increases their democratic knowledge and lastly councils have been pioneer in providing better opportunities for the students. But again the profession of teaching is solely based on teachers and teaching. This is an area which has to be left to the teachers as they are the ones who know what are the best possible ways for students to prosper. They know how students can improve and through what?

So, the solution to all these things is that we need to open the discussion more transparently to the teachers and students and schools on a much more common platform. We can get more light on these issue in the following link: http://news.Bbc.Co.Uk/2/hi/uk_news/education/6427909.Stm.

On a more positive note.
Grahame has completely re-designed the coffee machines part

2007-03-09T10:02:00.000Z

Why Punish Good Financial Management in Our Schools?

In a time eduation is one of the most underfunded areas of British finance, there are a number of schools who have done their best to run their establishment on a budget. Through good management, they've managed to end the year with a surplus and should rightly expect to carry that additional funding through to the next year where it could be earmarked for a special project, fund any additional staff, upgrade sports facilities, pay for new books or anything else that their usual annual entitlement may fall short of.

Instead of being rewarded by some form of verbal recognition for their ability to stockpile a little "rainy day" cash for next year, there's a proposal being made by some Ministers, that the schools who have managed to save money ought to be penalised by having some of their money "recycled" to schools who weren't so financially successful. Is this fair?

Perhaps it isn't fair to some schools that they are grossly underfunded and can't possibly manage to avoid an overspend, never mind create a financial nest egg, but this ought not be the financial responsibility of those schools who are funded correctly and have still managed to create a surplus. If the schools with a surplus were assessed on the same criteria for funding as the other schools, then they weren't over-funded - they just used it differently.

The schools who are underfunded need to have their budgets re-assessed by the Education Department, and if their financial needs are found to be greater than the initial budget assessment allocated, then it's the Government's Education Deparment that should be paying for the increase - not hand-outs from schools that were accurately assessed, and managed their budget well.

The future of our country is in the hands of those currently being short-changed by constant education under funding - it's about time we stopped spending so much money financing a war over seas and start looking towards investing more money on educating the next generation so that hopefully they find a less costly - in terms of life as well as money - way of settling international disputes!

Things seem good on the work front.
Well I have totally finished the eyelid surgery part

2007-03-08T09:42:00.000Z

Mayhem for the Cloning People!!

A recent government regulation has brought major stem cell and embryo researches to a near standstill. The cause of this development was blamed after excessive bureaucracies imposed by the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authorities. The delays in approving the laws and regulations concerned to cloning and embryology are so alow, that they are infact hindering the rapidly progressing efforts to understand the cloning processes which in turn could have boosted the scientific know how of serious diseases and stem cell production. This fast moving field has fallen into a pit of government's slow response due to which the ground breaking medical researches are still left unprogressed.

I seriously feel agitated by government's move. On one hand scientists are struggling hard day and night to cure more and more people, but on the other hand government is proving to be a obstacle in their path of progress. I simply cannot understand why government is making an issue of this thing. Why doesn't it give the scientific community a single opportunity to prove their credentials once? I am sure the scientists will the winners in this tug of war. The stem cell and embryo research is definitely for the benefit of mankind. If this progresses, many people can be cured from life threatening diseases.

So i strongly think government should lift all the bans it has imposed on the embryo and cloning rsearch projects and give them a positive path for moving ahead so that they result in human benefit and development of mankind.We can have a better insight of this issue by looking here.

Good news on the work front.
Ricco has completely redesigned the HIP part

2007-03-05T13:23:00.000Z

The Grand Wedding of the Year- Liz Hurley and Arun Nayar!!

Yes, the cat is finally out of the bag. Liz Hurley has offcially tied the knot with her long time Indian boyfriend Arun Nayar yesterday, back at Sudeley Castle in Gloucestershire inside a licensed room. The marriage was much in the news and media coverage. The wedding guest list not only include the couple’s family and close friends, but also celebs like Sir Elton John and partner David Furnish, as well as Donatella Versaci, who has created Liz’s wedding dress. The marriage was a very private affair. The former actress had wanted the arrangements to be kept as secret as possible. Marriage celebrations have already begun for the two. A big event has been hosted by the actress' friend Henry Dent-Brocklehurst.The wedding ceremony was led by Rev John Partington at St Mary's Church, a small chapel in the grounds of Sudeley Castle.

The couple are also going to have an Indianised version of their wedding at Arun's home state of Rajasthan in a beautiful palace in Umaid Bhavan Palace in Jodhpur.On Sunday night, the couple along with their guests will be flying to India where the traditional ceremonies will be held, with the main one being conducted at the Umaid Bhavan Palace in Jodhpur on March 9. Rumours are there that the reservations for the palace, booked for the grand wedding has run into rough weather.

Big arrangements have been made in India for this wedding in Udaipur, but the date for the marriage there is yet to be finalised.The former Estee Lauder model will not only have four make-up artists and three hairdressers, and a stylist to make sure that she looks her best, but also two on-call wedding planners, one personal assistant, and a photographer-all planned for the wedding in India.Hurley has requested the guest wear pink on their wedding in India.

On a positive note.
Irene suggested I change botox for sweating pages

2007-03-05T13:22:00.000Z

The price of Petrol, guess what it's rising!

Well they found the source of the petrol problem. And guess what :

"the incident could force prices up by 2p a litre"

Is there nothing in the world which doesn't increase the price of petrol? This is odd I thik petrol prices should be stupidly taxed, I believe we should all use public transport. But something goes ping in my head when I hear, "the bad weather is going to force the price of petrol to rise", "The winner of X factor is going to force petrol prices to rise", "Sherbut Dib Dabs are going to force the price of petrol to rise" . Petrol being crap and blowing up your car is going to force petrol prices to rise! Conventional logic would say if a product is proved to be slightly lower quality and running a risk of ruining your car that would reduce the price. But since it petrol and we can't live without it we will continue to buy it until it become unviable to go to work anymore. The point where people will lose money by working due to the massive amount of money it will cost them to get there, is goign to be a funny time.

Well my opinion start stock pilign now, investing in petrol is going to be a lot safer bet than any stock or share.

At last progress on the site.
Well this is what I'm going to change next the botulinum toxin part

2007-03-02T09:22:00.000Z

Cadbury (Grave) Digging for Popularity

Cadbury Schweppes’ Dr. Pepper division kicked off a major marketing promotion last month – a treasure hunt. Searchers were encouraged to follow clues in their drinks to uncover real buried treasure in the form of gold coins spread across 23 cities in the United States. Each coin was worth between $10,000 and $1,000,000.

However, the promoters made a slight error in judgment when they buried one of the coins in a historic graveyard in Boston, Massachusetts.

Moments after the twenty-ninth clue for the Boston Hunt was released, the 347-year-old graveyard, which houses the mortal remains of several American Revolutionary patriots, was flooded with people waiting for the cemetery doors to open.

When snow and ice delayed the opening, calls flooded City Hall, with angry searchers demanding their chance to get into the graveyard and find their treasure.

Cadbury Schweppes was forced to shut down the treasure hunt in Boston, issue a public apology, and pay the city over 5,000 pounds in damages.

What I want to know is what marketing executive honestly thought that inviting people to dig up a graveyard could possibly be a good idea. Especially coming shortly on the heels of the furor that happened when Cartoon Network decided to post a few unauthorized ads, wouldn’t they want to discuss this issue with City Hall first?

Or was the scandal, and the resulting cancellation of the promotion, worth the few pounds that Cadbury Schweppes had to shell out? After all, people are still talking about the Cartoon Network incident. Maybe bad taste pays.

On a positive note.
Grahame has redesigned the home information pack solution part

2007-02-28T16:30:00.000Z

Second Hello World

I think I'm going to start every day saying hello to the world.

2007-02-28T15:18:00.000Z

Second Hello World

I think I'm going to start every day saying hello to the world.

2006-09-26T12:13:00.000Z

Houses of the Mole should it be censored

I was just listening to Ministry's Houses of the Mole CD and thought I would say some words on it. I already know, this cD originally released back in 2004 and Ministry and is not the latest of CDs put out by the group, nevertheless I believe it's one of their best CDs. My primary reason for liking this CD heaps is owing to its political statement and the controversy it caused among fans.
Considering Houses of the Mole was released in 2004, it was perfectly timed to coincide with the Presidential race in America. It was Bush whacking in it most innocent form, it's Unbelievably evident when you read the lyrics. They used underhand methods like naming all the track with words starting with the letter W. What I do not understand is why so many people were ticked when Ministry put out such a politically charged CD. The official line was that ministry should stick to playing non-offensive music and keep their nose out of politics. That is so utterly bonkers. This type of music is all about stirring up controversy and making political statements. Anybody who claims to be a enthusiast of this type of music should never get annoyed just since they do not agree with the statement the music makes. The way I see it, it's only those who are not factual believers in the freedom of expression this music represents.

I am doing work about botox presently, you understand the frown line reducing thing. I never understand what I am going to be doing next, first I am writing regarding oak masters for Norman next suddenly it on to thread veins treatments. But see what I have got to work with on the botox page. It did not understand but you can it is got lots of uses, botox can actually pervent migraines see here, it excellent what paralysing muscle can do for the body. Sharon offered it to me to try, I refused , again.

What is too silly to be said can be sung - P Beumarchais

2006-09-11T11:46:00.000Z

Diana's Ex Butler releaves truth aout the Princes

Paul Burrell, Princess Diana confident, butler and only friend. Has stepped up to the plate again to defend Diana memory. This time he's revealing the truth about how prince Harry and prince William are Evil and are not carrying on the quest to keep Diane constantly in the media, "They seem to think that just because nearly a decade has passed, that Diane death shouldn't be front page news. Things still need to be releaved, the public are still need to know the true story �". The Triangle of evil as Paul has named the three remaining member of her immediate family only commented, �Since 9 years have passed since the unfortunate incident we would like the opportunity to go one day without being constantly reminded and asked to comment.� they laughed.

Paul is just about to release his latest book that he has written in conjunction with the disembodied spirit of Diana, called �The way we were' in the book he releaved how they would while away the summer evening talking under the weeping willow in the Palaces orchards, discussing how to bring about world peace and how to cure orphans. He also reveals how Diana was not planning to marry Dodi Fayed, but actually was in love with him and was planning to whisk him off to a desert island where they could live out their life away from the constant media eye, that had dogged them both for so long, he told the Sun newspaper.
Paul also tell the truth about how Diane used to dress up in a bat suit at night time and he would help her catch some of London more hardened criminals.
---

Yep just trying my hand at satire.

Finally we have had progress with the website.
Lee suggested I change london cosmetic surgery part

2006-08-20T18:46:00.000Z

Political hell yer, coherent hell no!

If you still have not added System of Down's Mezmerize album to your collection, it is time to get off you behind and buy it. I had not heard anything about this band until early 1998 when they opened for Slayer and i've been a fan since. Their self titled first album was still a couple months away from release at the time, nevertheless I was attentively anticipating its arrival. I was not let down at all when the CD finally came out.

They followed this up with their second album, Toxicity, which was a major commercial success. I was thinking this CD was exceedingly good . Except, I have got to admit, I was disappointed in their third album entitled Steal this CD because it gave the impression of sluggishness. Mezmerize is quite possibly the most apporiate of the lot, it is as if the band has finally evolved into what it has always been capable of being. Mezmerize maintains that same odd sound that is unique to System of a Down. Still, it takes the music to a different league with superfast tempos and metal riffs. As always, make sure you read the song lyrics on this CD. At first, tracks like B.Y.O.B. Seem like fun party songs. Extremely, these tracks are making studies and comments on issues of the day and the government. This is precisely what you'd expect to get from a album from System.

An old forgotten about project has a got a brand spanking new least of life. A enjoyable small online solution designed to make home information packs available the smaller estate agents. It not awfully hard to understand. In future if you are trying to sell your property, you're going to need to have a home information pack put together. Therefore this system is designed to address this issue. Everything is finished online and is made incredible easy. Now I just have to figure out a good way to let the general public know.

An update waited seventy seven days for then to cought up the cash!

A good show

2006-07-27T14:28:00.000Z

Well today we did good, Shrimp Rocket, had a really good show, it was totally all the fun of the fair.

The great thing about it was we had one fo the worlds greatest audience. Three load laughting american and we were sorted. Evert single thing we did they laughted their provibrial heads off. Impro is a lot bigger thing in a america, generally speaking are audience are made up of 70% people we know or friends of people we know and then 30% of american tourists who are amazed they is no real impro in London.

This was a really good show though we had a completely different format what with using the three headed experts and a new gma ethat johneky made up called QVC, which basic is improvising a QVC show.

Well on a more boring note, I a have finished my work on the site and it is live, here now we are flogging hair removal like nobodies business. Finally Ron is off my back for the next week!

2006-07-18T14:26:00.000Z

Misery as a Art form!

If System of a Down's Mezmerize album is still not in your collection, you have to go out and purchase it today. Ever since I initially saw this band open in for Slayer back in 1998, i've been a enormous fan. They still had not released their self-titled first CD at this point, except I couldn't wait for it to come out. When the CD was released, I was far from dissatisfied in it.

They followed this up with their 2nd CD, Toxicity, which was a major commercial achievement. I additionally thought this CD was great. I wasn't quite therefore ecstatic with the third release (Steal this Album), since I was thinking the band was going soft. Mezmerize is quite conceivably the best of all of them, it's as if the group has finally evolved into what it has always been capable of being. When you listen to Mesmerize, you will still recognize that quirky sound that defines System of a Down. Still, it tock the music to a whole new level with superfast rhythms and metal riffs. However, like with any System CD, hou've got to be sure to read the song lyrics. Tracks like B.Y.O.B. Seem like they're bugger all more than party songs at first. Actually, the tracks provide scathing political commentary and studies on current events. Precisely what you would expect from an album put out by System.

An old project has a got a brand new least of life. Forfronts, home information pack online solution. It's genuinely exceedingly straight forward. Before next year, a HIP is going to become a legal requirement to sell your house. The concept behind first 4 HIPS is that anyone with the correct skills can produce a pack in a little amount of time that that makes everything legal. Now I've just got to figure out a good way to tell the world.

Well looking for investment properties, a couple we could possible afford!

2006-07-06T21:25:00.000Z

Ow for a skilled screamer

My buddies and me just got back from the public house. We had found out there was going to be a few marvelous band performing there that we had to to see. This bloke has exactly the same taste in music as me, therefore I was looking forward to watching these lads perform. I was expecting a wonderful night-time when I entered the pub. Right away, you can tell if the audience is into the same music as you, you know what I am trying to say.

I knew from the start this crowd was not filled with pop princesses. The music was roaring and there were a few cool death metal guitar riffs going on. Then, the singer begun in and my evening was over. Some singers seem to think this kind of music is just concerning screaming. It really annoys me when they do that. Screaming certainly has it's role in this type of music, therefore do not think I'm getting old or something. It just needs to be done the correct way! In fact, I have respect for the guys who can get it right because it is not something just anyone can do. You've to know when to do it and how to do it to sound professional. It is just better to leave the screaming to other groups if the vocalist can't do it right , or get a new singer!

A quick plug for a friends site. Mr Parrot has a website that sells UK veterinary insurance, nevertheless they're just concerning to take the huge leap into animal on a whole, they're going to be doing full blown pet insurance. They have invested quite a lot in the venture so wishing them the best of luck, they just wrote an online quoting system that took them a increaible amount of time, in danger of sounding like a tacky advert, why not see how much you'd save!!!

Philip I asked about and apparently you are gay.

Punky!!

2006-02-22T01:20:00.000Z

Punk Karaoke at the Garage!

Punk!! I went to Punk Karaoke last night at The Garage in Inslington . It's just your standard gig but you get to be the front man (well at least for part of the evening!). Just imagine what you could do with a excellent punk band. It happen ever two weeks, and is totally over subscribed.

They play two sets, including true punk hits and some popular songs punked up. You don't even need to know the song that well they have a hidden TV complete with bouncing ball. It's the most hard core night of punk you can have!

On the flip side, the fly in the soup is everyone is soo damm GOOOD it's not like the hair brush and turn up hi fi where anyone can sing 'Bryan Adams' stuff. Most the singers are mind blowing some of them must be in bands. The best parts were Jade belting out 'Everybody's Happy Nowadays' and Ro ruining 'Fight for your right to party'. PUNK is live and well.

Here is some other great stuff I have been looking at. Well if your bored their a huge selection of online games on lunararcade. A friend of mine, Katie has been redesigning court house clinics website. have a looks see what you think.

And it goodbye from me and goodbye from er me.

2006-02-08T17:00:00.000Z

I'm missing the nineties!! Which of these ring a bell?

You longed to live in Beverley Hills 90210

Girls actually fancied Gary Barlow more than Robbie Williams

You can remember Todd Landers in Neighbours

You collected Premier League Stickers and did swops at playtime

You owned a sweater shop, Bennetton, NafNaf jumper or waistcoat

You wore a pair of Nike Air Max to death!

Mr Motivator (What ever happened to him?)

A grey Fruit of the Loom jumper was a must have fashion acessiory.

The Racoons!

Girls owned scrunchies in an array of colours and tacky headbands with their names written on in thick glitter

Here is some other cool sites using the old googster. My mate Dave has quit his job as a chef and is now working for first4sale a online estate agent, check it out. Here is a interesting one. I've started to write about something called Home information packs! HIPS

Bye-Bye

2006-01-21T17:59:00.000Z

A-ha

It's going to be incredible. I didn't believe it when Sally told me a-Ha are doing a small gig the next week!!! I really just can't wait!!!! The A-HA craving is sending me and Shara put the wall. I am SOOO LUCKY!! Damm it I'm never going to get any work done now. So that's another day off work for me just so I can get int he front row - if its standing. OH MY GOD!!! By march we'll have seen a-Ha 5 times!! When I first like a-Ha I was 6, it never even crossed my mind that I would possibly ever get the chance to see a-Ha in my life, never mind meet them and see them. OH MY GOD. They are the great band ever ever ever.

To end with some killer sites I have been procrastinate with! Does anyone want a free gmail invite? I think the goign live date for my latest site modern Cleo is nearly here:

Goodbye for now!

2006-01-19T21:28:00.000Z

Alien Loves Predator online comic

I've found a new comedy site. A web comic called Alien Loves Predator written and photographed by Bernie Hou. It is a spoof of the Predator and Aliens films. The idea is rather than ripping each other to shreads in this They live together and are good mates, they still have playful fights just less physical. The star characters are Alien Abe (sex starve, socially inept and impulsive) and Preston the Predator who usually plays the straight man.

Other character include Jesus, Abe's Mother and Zeev. My favorite bit is the point all they have done is used their own figures.

Now for some new sites I have been procrastinate with! Do you remeber Sonic the hedgehog? Well here is a online version of the game called ultimate sonic. I think the goign live date for my latest site modern Cleo is nearly here:

And this is me signing off!!

2006-01-14T17:39:00.000Z

A sneak perview of Longhorn operating system.

I've got this email through the post. I'm not even sure who sent it to me, It must be some screen shots of the new operating system from Microsoft.

Longhorn is being considered a major Windows release by Microsoft, and early alpha builds are being bug tested at Redmond campus company. However many of the alpha version have been illegally distrbuted onto the net, which has had a rippling effect all across the internet. See what you think:.

Some more close up shots:

Keep in mind this is a work in progress and may not bear that much resemblance to the final system. Well, major UI work, integrated DVD burning, a database-based file system and lots more are still in the pipeline.

Last but not least some killer stuff I found on my travels. A quick plug for a website Kate has some work on court house cosmetic surgery.

I suppose I best do something more productive now. Thanks for reading.

2006-01-08T18:00:00.000Z

Stuff on my cat website.

Check out stuff on my cat!

There is something about the expression on cats' faces that makes it so funny when you make them do stupid things. This website is built around this concept. The submitted photos are so good that everyone will find it funny.

Here's some groovy stuff I found. My fiend Brigit looks after Migratory Birds in her own Wildlife reserve, that is completely run by donation and jobs that she can do from home. Drop in and have a look. Persently I doing a logo for a site called modern cleo but the site isn't up yet, I guess it will be at www.moderncleo.co.uk but I can't confirm yet.

Hay the Simpsons is on, I'm outta here.

2006-01-06T22:50:00.000Z

My new diet: Frogs

I've just read a strange book on the recommendation by Alex our resident jazz singer. Strange really, it's kinda a hippie's business managment bible. However it has a strange magic to it, usually I can't read this type of thing.

The main idea is quite easy to understand the frog is a direct metaphor for work, so the most painful the certain task is, the larger and uglier hence unpalatable it is, the less you are going to want to consume it. The main idea is simple, if as soon as you get out of bed in the morning is start eatting the biggest and wartiest frog you have avaliable then pretty much everything else that day is going to be better.

The book lists 21 different rules. All the rules reinforce the main frog eatting idea. I found it really useful.

Just to complete your day how about some cool stuff I've been amusing myself with. We have all be planning to go on mass to a speed dating thing and we stubbled across this what do you think? This is the latest property job I have been working on H.I.P.S. (Home information packs!! they will become compulsary by law in two years).

And this is me signing off!!

freecyclelondon : FreeCycle London

2006-01-05T19:29:00.000Z

freecyclelondon : FreeCycle London
Okay now this is a cool find. Do you have a load of old stuff you don't have enought time or space for. Want to get rid of some old furniture and don't want to pay for it to be dumped.

Then have a look at Free cycle it's like ebay but no one pays and the person wanting the good is in charge of picking it up, personally I think it great.
I don't think I will every buy furniture again and I have the benefit of feeling all smug about recycling things.

SAVE the enviroment use FreeCycle.

Check out my new site London comedy stuff

2006-01-03T23:11:00.000Z

Happy 2006.

It's all over it's now 2006. I no longer need to celebrate! Which is about time, I have constantly been either celebrating or recovering from celebrating. It was my sisters Bday on the 27th of December. This has ment that pretty much everyday from the beginning of December to the beginning of January I have been pretty much celebrating anything.

My body is going into shock, if I just see a glass of wine my body wretchs and I get the same reaction to party poppers. So I have gone is detox , so I will be giving my body a rest. But this wil not sit well with my sister, who thinks that the either of January should be her birsthday.

Here's some great stuff I found whilst surfing. Check out this cool website: walnutsmoothie career personaility test. Read the whole thing. Persently I doing a logo for a site called modern cleo but the site isn't up yet, I guess it will be at www.moderncleo.co.uk but I can't confirm yet.

Bye-Bye

Outgoing Links, good or bad for PR.

2005-12-31T11:46:00.000Z

I couldn't resist join in a thread on a forum concerning If Google Page Rank is drained by outgoing links. Now this debate went on for quite a while just repeating ourselfs mainly because chrishirst was wrong and refused to be beaten by a newbi, upstart like myself. His total belief that:

The calculation is for incoming links to page A. the outgoing links on page A are not factored into the calculations so they cannot have even the slightest effect on the value.

If you read the thread here, you can see why I didn't want to quit. The conversation is bizarre, even though I (nixies) had defeated every one of his points he still refused to admit that he may be wrong.

The debate was completely ground to a halt because; He could not get his head around how if the calculation was based only on incoming links how could outgoing links reduce the amount og Page Rank.

We repeated the same points for ages, I tried to get make him understand that the formula was done from scratch each time, and it did not need to be minus in the equation.

There are a few things that need to be understood when figuring out how google's page rank calulation works:

Each time the calculation is done it is done from scratch; no prior Page rank is worked in the equation.
The equation is repeated multiple times.
The calculation is done for each individual page not site.
The green bar shown on the toolbar is just a label given to a page depending on the group that the actual page rank falls into.

This is how it can be though about. Bear in mind this is a simplification (also if you look at the actual equation the specifics are wrong, it designed to make it easier to understand like went you find out that everythign you learnt in GCSE physic was all a lie when you do A Level Physic).

At the begining of the equation each index page is given a value of 1; part of this value is given as a vote which is divided between all of the pages that it links to. So a new value is calulated. This bit everyone agrees on, pagerank is made up of vote from your inbound links.

This is where it gets tricky, the equation is repeated a least 40 times, so the pervious pagerank that has been gain on pervious calulation can be passed on. This process is repeated multiple times. So because your vote is devided between the pages that you have links to, if you link to pages that are voting for you then in the next calculation (vote) you are going to end up with more page rank than if you would have linked to a lot of pages that do not link back to you.

And this is the main point if you link out of your site, to a site that does not link back. The pagerank is not coming back to your site so you are going to drain/leak/lose pagerank.

What effect page rank has on how well your site is ranked? That is a much more complicated question.

I know you've all been waiting for the killer stuff I have been procrastinate with! My mate Dave has quit his job as a chef and is now working for first4sale a online estate agent, check it out. This is my mates site that he designed to help you sell your house

Until next time. I leave you with a tear in my eye.

2005-12-26T22:22:00.000Z

Festive Telly

What a boring Christmas for Television, usually christmas day is the one that you can rely on for good stuff. It was a day of Simpsons, Coronation Street and Eastenders. As you can see a once in a life time treat (Sarcasm).

But their was one exception DOCTOR WHO. David Tennant was staring in the role as Dr Who, at first I though he was going to be terrible at the begining he was a little wooden but in the end he fantastic, in the last fight when he was back to full strength his speech was delivered amazingly.

I know you've all been waiting for the webs offerings I stumbled across. Here is a place wear you can buy the same hats that everyone else buys but at factory prices. Persently I doing a logo for a site called modern cleo but the site isn't up yet, I guess it will be at www.moderncleo.co.uk but I can't confirm yet.

Hay the Simpsons is on, I'm outta here.

2005-12-22T16:12:00.000Z

Plans to bring back Futurama

A recent discussion with Matt Groaning and David X. Cohen. Has resurrected new hope that they may start work on the next series of the previously cancelled Futurama.

Cohen Commented. "One month ago I would also have said we were going to start tomorrow. So ..." He pauses. "My current estimate is that we're starting tomorrow."

The series was cancelled because the television run of the show was rather unsuccessful, however the DVD sales where massive and ongoing so their was a outcry to recommission the series. In the last episode 'The Devil's Hands Are Idle Playthings' was left at a strange point where it imply that Fry and Leela had finally got it together. This meaning that the two primary characters had finally got together and the story was complete. It was only suggested though and could easily just be forgotten to make a sequel.

Last but not least some fantasic stuff I found. Here is a selection of the worst short stories you have ever seen, they don't promise to be anything else, but can be quite amusing. A quick plug for a website I have done some work with recently court house cosmetic surgery.

Hope you're not feeling too bored. Bye

2005-12-19T16:02:00.000Z

I love the Mighty Boosh

I have just found out the Mighty Boosh is doing a theatre piece in the centre of London. And the crazy thing is the price, only eight pounds that plain maddess what are they a charity?. They deserve more than that, that walking around money that just a insult to the freshest cult comedy to hit the UK in the last 10 years. It's degrading, I refuse to pay so little I will turn up kicking and shouting and throwing fifty pound notes at them until they submit. 8 pounds is a insult.

Here is some other killer sites I have been procrastinate with! We have all be planning to go on mass to a speed dating thing and we stubbled across this what do you think? Here is a interesting one. I've started to write about something called Home information packs! HIPS

Very many thanks to you all.

2005-12-17T10:33:00.000Z

Photo fun!

Well I have been going though my photo collection trying to find a apporaite image to put on a online dating site. I'm trying to figure out which is my best look I have reduce my choice down to the two best but I don't know which one the ladies will think is the most hottest.What do you think?

or my personal favorite

Hay who am I kidding, I alway look fantasic It doesn't matter.

Last but not least some new sites I found by reading other blogs. He's a shamless plug for a company that we work with coffee vending machines. Have you heard about the grovement new latest scheme for home buyers? Home information packs! Have a look.

And now the time is near and I must face my final curtain...

2005-12-17T00:43:00.000Z

A night of Jazz

The 'date' is now over, It started off badly. She turned up 30 minutes late I thought this was going to be a bad sign. I was worry that she didn't really like me and was just going along with it because it was easier than saying go away, and beign 30 minutes late was a pretty good indercation that she didn't really care. It did kinda start off slow I suppose she went into continuous talking mode, and she can talk to the point you just can't get a word in and it started off like that.

But as the night when on (Night it was suppose to be lunch). She relaxed as the evening went on and conversation started to flow more easily. I try to kiss her in the coffee house and she kinda ignored me, that was awkward. But when we got to the jazz show we just talk to start with then we started hugging and sitting arm in arm.

Then before she got on her bus home she kissed me. Now that is a good sign.

Here is some other cool sites I've been amusing myself with. Here is a place wear you can buy the same hats that everyone else buys but at factory prices. I have been doing some work recently on this website: court house clinics. What do you think?

I must sleep.

2005-12-11T23:13:00.000Z

Second chance!

Odd update on my love life, Okay I met this girl a few weeks ago and was very impressed by her she was very very cool. I forgot to get her phone number and went through hell trying to get in contact with her ultimately I managed to get in contact with Abby and she said to me that I should give up. everything is okay, I could get on with my life, I know when to quit.

Then I turned up to see some friends of mine do some impro when to the pub afterwards and She just turned up out of the blue. Just standing around chatting to a bunch of people that she didn't really know, No apparent reason, Abby wasn't even their and she was the only reason that Tara knew that lot.

I totally though she didn't want anythign to do with me. So I played it really cool, to cool I was actually quite nasty at some points. Then at the end of the evening I wasn't go to make the same mistake, so I made damm sure I had her phone number. So to gut a long story short, we are having lunch on Wednesday.

Just to complete your day how about some new sites I found by reading other blogs. He's a shamless plug for a company that we work with coffee vending machines. A friend of mine, Kate has been rebuilding court house clinics website. have a looks see what you think.

Oh well.

2005-12-01T15:44:00.000Z

Don't you hate Girls

Now this is bad, I've fallen for this girl. I have no reason to feel ashamed. She was beautiful and funny. I am single so it's not a problem. I like to stay single, I like to consider myself a free spirit and just want to have fun. My experinece of coupledom is that it is very restricting, I have never been short of companionship and I have more hobbie than I can serious ever do.

So the point I am making is I like to be single, but occasionally I meet these amazing women and I no longer have control over what I do. Everythign else just kinda fades into the background. It's happened twice before, Kiri and Josie. They sent me round the bend. I can feel the heavy pain again in my heart, I hate it, I just want it to stop. I have just started to get my life together.

I know you've all been waiting for the cool sites I've been amusing myself with. My fiend Brigit looks after Migratory Birds in her own Wildlife reserve, that is completely run by donation and jobs that she can do from home. Drop in and have a look. This is the latest property job I have been working on H.I.P.S. (Home information packs!! they will become compulsary by law in two years.

Hay the Simpsons is on, I'm outta here.

2005-11-25T16:54:00.000Z

Haven't even got time to blog!?!

I can't cope, so kindly accept my aploigy for not having posted recently, My resolution this year will be to post 3 times a week at least.

Recently I decided to take on a massive new project, and I'm having some cash flow problem so I've have excusses for being so peroccupied.

I've still had time to look at rubbish on the net:

Why get married and make one man miserable when I can stay single and make thousands miserable?
-- Carrie Snow

Last but not least some killer sites I have been procrastinate with! Check out this cool website: walnutsmoothie career personaility test. Read the whole thing. I have been doing some work recently on this website: court house clinics. What do you think?

Anyway I must go work or something.

2005-11-20T17:05:00.000Z

Strong Bad's comedy emails.

Okay this site is odd, these guys must be really bored. It's about a well I'm not sure what he is but his name is Strong bad. Now the site has loads of stuff on it but my favourite bit is Strong bad's email, it's like an agony aunts column, Then he goes and chats to his mates and you get to watch the crazy goings on.

These are my favourites:

When the movies have ended, try clicking on things.

Now for some groovy sites I've been amusing myself with. Another plug for a friend of mine, he makes really quality oak doors. Do you remeber Sonic the hedgehog? Well here is a online version of the game called ultimate sonic.

Goodbye for now!

2005-11-19T19:25:00.000Z

back street back, alright!!

Bloody hell take a look at this. It's a internet movie of a couple of Chinese kids sing along to 'I want it that way' by the backstreet boys. It's quite impressive it looks like they have come up with their own dance moves and everything My favorite thing is their mate trying to ignore them.

See for yourself!

Here's some groovy sites I found. An old family of mine has started a online gallery of still life. Have a look. Oooo why not suprise your mum with a birthday Tea Towels? Nothing says I love you like a tea towel! (Sarcasm)

And it goodbye from me and goodbye from er me.

Spooky Party time!

2005-10-24T14:51:00.000Z

Well Lou, Liz and frazer are decorating their flat like a cavern of dispare so we can praise our lord satan and get drunk in the name of Halloween! I can't wait! Me, Diane and Simon think we'll go. but god knows what we will wear. I might do something of the undead variety, maybe a Ghoul, Zombie or a Mummy. We may even go as a group, that would make things easier things easier to find. I done a lot of dressing up at university, but Im always worried about over doing it, most fancy dress parties, to allow people to just come dressed as the blue brothers or a movie star in a boring role and then I turn up on fire and no one will talk to me.

Everyone agrees to disagree!

2005-10-18T09:57:00.000Z

Well I wrote a note to to the whole cast basically saying what I had said previously and amazingly everybody agreed or didn't say anythign at all. Diane wote this:

"We never anticipated mini-shrimplings banging down our door clamouring to join the gang"

So nothing is certain yet but we will talk more tonight. The main reason I'm beign such a pain I want them to actually think about it, I’m not to worry if she does or does not join but doing it just because it would be harder to tell no is just pathetic.

I've still had time to look at rubbish on the net:
"I think we should take Iraq and Iran and combine them into one country and call it Irate. All the pissed off people live in one place and get it over with."
- Denis Leary

Here is some other cool stuff I stumbled across. Oooo why not suprise your mum with a birthday Tea Towels? Nothing says I love you like a tea towel! Here is more craziness form the boys at walnut smoothie email joke.
You want more? Well I'm spent!